Takes

Scotty Scheffler's iron play has been average and inconsistent for a pro golfer this season.

I'd say bad for a pro golfer. He's 82nd right now [in strokes gained]. He's average on the PGA tour this season with his irons. This is a stat that he's led each of the last three seasons. If Steph Curry started to miss free throws, you'd be looking around going, what's going on here?

I'm going to 'shock the world' and win the Masters this week.

I say we shock the world to win the thing. I've been thinking a lot about it. I feel like not winning's less fun than winning. So I'm kind of just gonna go for it.

If Tiger makes the cut at Augusta a week after his DUI arrest, it would be the most impressive sports story in the last 10 years

What if he played well? How would the announcers talk about it? I think they'd immediately jump to like what a redemption story this is. Tiger making the cut out of Augusta after getting arrested for DUI seven days before — is this the most impressive sports story that we've had in the last 10 years?

Tiger Woods is a bad guy for repeatedly driving under the influence

Tiger Woods got in another car crash... Tiger, the memories he's given us... I don't understand some of the Tiger fanboys that can't just like separate it at this point and be like, hey, if he was doing this... bad guy! You're putting other people's lives at risk... schools are getting out? Bad guy.

Tiger Woods is an all-time scumbag for not hiring a driver despite his wealth

If you're Tiger Woods, it is so easy for you to afford a full-time driver... and he doesn't, and the only difference between some people trying to defend Tiger right now, and Tiger being an all time scumbag is that he got lucky and didn't hurt anybody... if he does hurt somebody, it's going to be the biggest no shit moment ever. Big time scumbag.

Ludvig Åberg is a choker who can't win on Sundays under pressure

Ludvig Åberg. Can't win the big one. Yeah. Big time. Can't win the big one. Another choke. Choke to the masters... He stinks on Sundays. I don't know what it is about him... just when he gets under pressure he just melts down.

The Arnold Palmer umbrella logo exists because Palmer saw a woman getting out of a car with an umbrella and got horny

Arnold Palmer stood up and then he looked outside. He saw a really hot chick getting out of the car and she had an umbrella and he's like, 'fellas, I've got it: umbrellas. We gotta do umbrellas.' So he just got horny. He got horny for a chick he happened to see and he's like, 'we're doing umbrellas.'

The LIV Dam is about to break with Brooks Koepka's return to the PGA

Brooks is back. ... If one of [Bryson DeChambeau, Jon Rahm, or Cam Smith] flips, that's a second massive domino that it will be tough to come back from. ... The damn could break.

Betting on Europe at +170 is a 'hammer' bet

I think the fact that you're getting plus money on Europe is wild. I would, I would, I would hammer Europe right now. I think, I think it, I think it's potential for blowout on the European side.

Brandel Chamblee is using bots to generate fake YouTube views for Bryson DeChambeau's content

I put him [Brandel Chamblee] on the Hot Seat because there's just no way Brandel Chamblee is this locked in... but he said, 'I have no doubt that bots are generating a lot of those views.'

Winning the Ryder Cup as a playing captain would make Keegan Bradley an all-time legend, perhaps better than winning a major

If he wins as the playing captain, you're an all time legend. All time... Winning as a playing captain might be better than winning a major. I think I could see that being the truth.

Tommy Fleetwood is a bonafide choker

Tommy Fleetwood is, I think I love him now 'cause it's rare that we have like just a good old bonafide, old fashioned bonafide choker and that's all he is. He can't win a [tournament].

If I win the Open Championship this weekend, I will officially take the Blake of the Year title from Blake Griffin

I'm not dead. I've never wanted to win a golf tournament so bad. [The deal is] if I win the Open Championship this weekend, I officially get [Blake Griffin's] Blake of the Year title this year. Verbatim. That's what it'll be.

If Tiger Woods were named Panther Irons, he would have been outed as a sex deviant much earlier and his career would be totally different

Do you think Tiger Woods' career would be the same if he was named Panther Irons? If Panther Irons gets outed as a sex deviant very early in his career, is there a chance Panther Irons just is like, now that everyone knows, I'm just gonna lean into just being a guy who sucks and fucks all the time... then his back doesn't get hurt.

Tommy Fleetwood choked at the Travelers Championship

Tommy Fleetwood, I don't really feel bad for [him]. He choked bad. He did choke. Like that's a choke that I... I was yelling USA at my TV.

Terrell Hatton will win the Open Championship at Port Rush

Heading into the year, my prediction was Hatton. I just had a feeling that Terrell Hatton's gonna win a major this year... I'm gonna go with the crazy man in Terrell Hatton. He's a linky type of player... That's my pick for now.

The winner of the 2025 US Open at Oakmont will be over par

I think based on what I've been reading and seeing on Twitter, like we might have like a a over par winner... I want that. I love that about the US Open.

Tiger Woods is an extreme introvert who was broken by being forced into the Michael Jordan marketing playbook

It's always astonishing that no one in that room at Nike... occurred to no one that the playbook had been built around Michael Jordan, who is an extreme extrovert. And they applied it to Tiger Woods, who is an extreme introvert and like, honestly feels like they broke him.

Rory McIlroy's potential Masters victory will have an asterisk because he's been using an illegal driver

Rory had an illegal driver at the Masters asterisk. He needs to still win the masters to complete the grand slam.

Scottie Scheffler is just a Masters merchant and hasn't proven he can dominate other majors

He's also gonna be the new narrative guy. He might just be a masters merchant. He's got, he's got a win in major that's not the masters... People compare to Tiger. These are his, you know, finishes and majors in his last 10 majors. It's not the greatest.

I am officially 'opting out' of ever playing Augusta National

I have opted you. You forget Big Cat like three years ago on this show. I said I don't want to play at Augusta. I'm not Augusta material. All right. Fair. I'm opting out.

Tiger Woods is no longer a 'force of nature' in golf

Tiger Woods such a force of nature in golf for the last 20 years... this does feel like the first year where it's, I don't wanna say it's over 'cause I hope he plays again, but it does feel kind of over where it's like, you know, the Achilles injury and he already was already banged up and the leg problems. Is it do, can you feel that vibe where it's like that force of nature is no longer here?

Phil Mickelson has a legit chance to win the Masters this week

I think Phil's got a chance. Oh I think Phil has a legit chance this week. He's been playing some solid golf and kind of going back to like what plays well here is a great iron player and somebody that's excellent around the Greens. I think Phil, he finds himself in contention it feels like every two years. So I think Phil, in terms of extreme long shots, I'm a big fan of his number this week.

Tiger Woods' career as a competitive golfer is over following his Achilles rupture

My Hot Seat is Tiger Woods... I don't know, but it's clutch foot. It's just injury after injury. It's over. It sucks, but it's over. It's probably over.

Victor Hovland sucks

Victor Hovland sucks. That was a bad decision by us with the whole death thing. And then he was eating ice cream. That sucked. This is a tough course.

Adam Scott will win the 2024 Open Championship

I'm going to Adam Scott. He played well last week... He's 44 years old finishing in the top 10. Hasn't finished in the top 10 in a major since 2019. But I feel like he's one of those guys... I feel like Adam is playing well.

If you protest at a sporting event, your punishment should be getting hit with a ball from that sport

Your punishment should just be directly related to the sport. They should have to go stand at the tee box and Scottie Scheffler and Tom Kim get the tee one like right at them. That's what it should be.

Rory McIlroy's makeup sex with his wife is propelling his US Open performance

Now that [McIlroy] is back, he's having the makeup sex, and the makeup sex is propelling him to get in the hole.

Tiger Woods has a chance to finish Top 20 at Pinehurst because it is an easy walk

This might be the US open course that he [Tiger Woods] does... Because this is probably of all the US open venues, this might be the easiest of the walks. Okay. And that's what it takes for Tiger. Now that's part of the issue. It ain't the course, it's the walks. And the, and the stances.

Bryson DeChambeau will win the U.S. Open as an homage to Payne Stewart

I think this is it for Bryson [DeChambeau]. If Bryson comes and wears, because remember he used to wear the scaly cap. Payne Stewart. I could see it happening. As a homage to Payne Stewart. I'll call my shot right now.

Rory McIlroy will get a performance boost from his recent divorce filing

Rory McElroy divorce bump... Scotty Scheffler baby bump. Rory McElroy divorce. Divorce bump... I think it might be Rory divorce bump.

Golfers should be allowed to use any club they want, regardless of size

My take is that you should be allowed to use whatever club you want. Yeah. Ever. Like all the time. Doesn't matter how big it is. Gets blow in the hole. You should, you should be allowed to cheat at golf with the clubs that you use. You, you obviously have to take your own shots. But if they're your clubs, they're in your bag. Just get the ball in the hole.

Max Homa needs to be more of an asshole to win major championships

I do like [Max Homa], but I think he has that Rory disease... He wants to be liked too much. He's a very nice guy. But I want him to be more of an asshole because I think assholes win these things.

I would not leave the Masters if I were winning, even for the birth of my first child

If I was winning the Masters, I would not leave. First kid. I agree with you. First kid. First kid. I would first kid if I was winning the Masters. If I was winning the Masters, I would not leave.

Tiger Woods was better at golf when he was 'dirtier' and having more sex

Tiger was at his best when... the grip of his putter smelled like absolute shit from his hands. Perkins waitresses. The dirtier Tiger was the better golf. Yeah. When he was getting it in the hole. Now he's gonna not do, maybe he just can't have sex 'cause he like, he can't walk.

Golf galleries should cheer throughout the entire swing to create consistent background noise

I also kind of wish that they would be able to cheer throughout the entire swing. Because... then it just becomes background noise. So just, just cheer everyone cheered through the backswing.

Rory McIlroy acted like a bitch at the Ryder Cup and I personally do not like him

Rory's a bitch. He acted like a bitch. I don't like Rory. He's, I know that everyone fucking loves him. I don't like him. I'm sorry. I don't like Rory. ... I personally do not like him.

It wouldn't be surprising if Phil Mickelson joined LIV just so the Saudis could bankroll his gambling debt

He gambled so much that it, it wouldn't be surprising if Phil like gets in bed with the Saudis and tries to have them bankroll him.

I'm officially off the Rory McIlroy train

I'm off Rory officially. Okay. All right. Well it's, I'm officially off Rory now. It's gonna be 10 years going into the next season, right? Yeah. It's been 10 years. He'll never win a major Championship.

Rory McIlroy's focus on the FedEx Cup is 'loser talk'

[Rory] said, I don't think that way. I think about trying to go and win a fourth FedEx here in a couple weeks. Go try and win a fifth race to Dubai. Go and win a fifth rider cup. I just keep looking forward that my friends is loser talk. FedEx Cup means nothing.

The Saudis do not care about golf and are only using it to sports wash their image

Do you know how many golf courses Saudi Arabia has? They got nine. They don't care about golf. They're trying to sports wash their image.

Rory McIlroy will miss the cut at the Open Championship because it's 'too much of a storybook ending'

I have a hot take. I think [Rory McIlroy] is gonna miss the cut. Yeah, I think everything, because the last time they played here was the last time he won a major. He's been playing good golf. He won this weekend. Everyone—it's almost too much of a storybook ending and I think he's just gonna come out and blow up.

Charlie Woods will start his own professional golf league

Tiger Woods' [son] Charlie is gonna start his own golf league. A professional golf league. Outside. That's why he has him a commenting.

The USGA's ban on the belly putter was a major mistake that cost me money and potential Ryder Cup appearances

I would think a lot of times of how much money this [belly putter ban] cost me or how many Ryder Cups maybe this cost me or majors or whatever... it was a tough time but I now when I look back, it's great cuz I shoved it, you know, screw them and now I feel better than ever.

If Rory McIlroy doesn't win the Open Championship this year, the narrative will become that he will never win another major.

I think if he doesn't win the open championship this year, then I think start of next season, Rory [McIlroy] will never win a major championship. It goes back to that conversation.

I am going to win the US Open this weekend

[PFT: Are you gonna win?] Brooks Koepka: I mean, that's why I'm on here. Yeah.

I want to finish my career with at least 10 major championship wins.

Double digits man. That's where honestly, that's what I want. ... because I think what only three guys have ever had double digits.

Jay Monahan and Rory McIlroy are the biggest losers of the LIV/PGA merger

The biggest losers in this, Jay Monahan number one, probably Rory McIlroy number two. Not because Rory's a bad guy, just because he was the most vocal. And Brandel Chamblee, because he really dug his feet in on the take. It's one of the saddest days in the history of professional golf.

Tiger Woods' injuries always seem to flare up exactly when he starts playing poorly

I wouldn't say this, but some people online would say this... Tiger's injury did seem to come on like a wave as soon as he started playing bad. I wouldn't say that... but I read that and I was like, Hmm. Something to think about.

Max Homa needs to start being mean to people so the media stops asking him for favors

This is part of [Max Homa] being a slut. He can't say no... we gotta harden him. He needs to know Max with his fist, not a ball with his fist. He needs to start hitting people... start hitting maybe a cameraman. I don't know. Just start hitting people out of anger. Be a guy that no one wants to go up and ask to do something... He needs to find his little mini-Ellen DeGeneres streak where he starts being mean to people.