Takes

Only Jokic, Luka, and Giannis are untradeable for the Wembanyama pick

Jokic, you'd hang up. Luka, you'd hang up. Giannis, you'd hang up. Embiid, you'd trade him. Tatum probably [trade him]. Booker... the list is probably like three guys. ... Normally I'd go, well wait, I don't wanna trade a guy who I know has already done it for somebody that I've never seen actually do it. But that's how special Victor is.

I have probably walked by at least six serial killers in my lifetime

Number of serial killers walked by. I think it's over three people. Holy shit, six. I like that because then it's like, holy shit.

I've eaten way more chicken wings than anybody else in the PMT room

Chicken wings eaten. I bet you I'd be topping this room. I think I've eaten way more chicken wings than anybody else here.

Orcas are attacking boats to train their young to hunt, not for revenge

Update on those orca attacks. Turns out the orcas may be using the boats that they're attacking to train the younger orcas, how to hunt. It may not be some sort of retribution situation.

Baby Gronk's football career will not go past high school without elite size and speed

If baby Gronk isn't big and fast and, and and tall enough, it doesn't matter if he's really, really good, just like you said, like it, it won't matter. It, his career will, will not go any further than, than high school football because that's just how football works.

I have officially quit vaping cold turkey

The idea of... that being something that people are talking about after a playoff game is annoying enough to provoke me to never do it again. And I've since quit classic McDaniel style cold turkey, just like alcohol.

Victor Wembanyama can defend the basket and the three-point line at the same time

He can defend the basket and the three point line at the same time. And I tell that to people and they go, you are out of your mind. Why would you even bother saying that? Because I'm telling you, I saw it. He'd be in the protecting the front of the rim. Kick it out to the corner and he would get out there in time to block it.

Frank Dux, the real-life inspiration for Bloodsport, is the greatest liar of all time.

Frank Dux is the greatest liar of all time. All of it is fake. It is based on a true story, except Frank Dux lied about his fighting record as well as the existence of the entire tournament, as well as his military record. He just keeps lying about everything. Everything is made up.

LeBron James and Nikola Jokic are incredibly similar players

I think LeBron James and Nicole Yoic are very, very similar. Hmm. And when and the eye test you say hell no. Like one's a great athlete freakish and the other guy can't jump over the Sunday newspaper. But you get away from that. Both those guys, their iq, their unselfishness, their ability to make everyone better and impact the game.

Aaron Judge is cheating and stealing signs again

My other hot seat was Aaron Judge got caught cheating, stealing signs again, Yankees back at it again.

LIV and PGA Tour players don't actually have bad blood with each other

There's no bad blood. All everybody's so chill about it, you know, that everyone understands. Right. It's a business at the end of the day... I think it was more like media driven than there is anything. But everybody's cool with each other.

Doc Rivers has the worst record in NBA history with a chance to clinch a series

Doc Rivers is now 17 and 33 straight up with a chance to clinch a series. That means 33 losses is the most of any coach in NBA history with a chance to clinch a series. So 34% when his team has a chance to clinch a series.

I can still bench press 225 pounds for 27 reps today

225. If I was to do it right now. Yeah, I could probably right now today get like 27.

There will be a massive tick population this year due to the mild winter

We had a very mild winter. There's a lot of ticks. The winter didn't kill the ticks. There's gonna be a lot of ticks. Tick-borne diseases are no joke. Be careful out there. Do tick checks. Get a buddy, get naked.

I am not moving to Chicago with the rest of the show

I will not be moving to Chicago. Kind of been in denial about it. It sucks to say there are various parts of my life that I keep private that impacted this decision. I hope you guys respect the decision. Please just remember that I am the only one who can weigh all the factors that impact my life.

Barstool Van Talk was going to be a hit TV show

Barstool Van Talk was gonna be a hit TV show. And as I poured over the 18 to 34 demo results of that first episode, that was a hit TV show. So that was the one that got away.

The Warriors are nearly unbeatable when Klay Thompson scores 30 or more points

Klay Thompson, when he scores 30 or more points... 64 and 10. Pretty good. When he has, when he's the perfect amount of high for a game, when he takes his edible and times it out perfectly before the game and he goes off, the Warriors win those games.

Marcus Smart will never have another shooting performance as good as Game 2

Marcus Smart will never shoot like that again. That's fact.

Connor McDavid is so fast he doesn't even get tired on the ice

I honestly don't think he even gets tired. ... He's just so fast. ... And the dual threat of being one of the best passers in the league and now having the ability to score kind of whenever you want, is just taking his game through the roof.

BPC-157 is a wonder drug for injury recovery with no downsides

BPC-157 is a wonder drug... inflammation, look, pain relief... no downside. It really is one of the best things you can do... I had an ankle sprain, I would literally put it right in my ankle and three days later it was fine.

The Buffalo Bills winning a Super Bowl would be the biggest merchandise market for Fanatics

What you generally look for is teams with great heritage that haven't won for a long time. The Buffalo Bills would be spectacular for business. Because they have great heritage... think about everyone who grew up in Buffalo who has any connectivity in Buffalo. Every one of them would buy $500 in merchandise.

Fruit Loops are all the same flavor regardless of color

Fruit loops don't have an individual taste. Your mind makes you think that the orange tastes like orange, yellow tastes like lemon banana. They all taste [the same].

Brooks Koepka is officially back as a top-tier golfer

Is Brooks officially back? Is he back? Yes. A hundred percent. It was good to talk to him Friday... he's healthy and if he's healthy he's rom strong. Brooks is strong too, man. Unequivocally Brooks Koepka back.

Bobby Knight once had his players stop a scripted play for the movie 'Blue Chips' because he didn't want to lose the possession

The director come in the huddle and he says, all right, we need about 15, 20 minutes to set up the last play. So Penny Hardaway is gonna throw the lob past the Shaquille O'Neill and then they win... As we're leaving the huddle to go play defense. Coach Knight says, 'Don't let him get it. Grab him.' So they run the play... We grab Shaq, the ball goes out of bound and he's yelling the director's yelling. Cut, cut, cut.

Every great tournament run includes a scary moment early on

It seems like every big run when you look at national champions, when you look at Final Four participants, usually out of their first four or five games, they had one really scary moment... Fortunately for us, we didn't have to bank in an 80 footer or anything like that.

Kevin Durant is having the greatest mid-range season in 25 years

Kevin Durant is... arguably having the greatest mid-range season in the history since we've been tracking this for 25 years and he's breathing life into it and it's beautiful to watch... Kevin's almost 60% right now. It's incredible.

Nikola Jokic is giving up more points on layups than any player in the tracking era

He's giving up more points per game on layups as the closest defender of any player in the player tracking era, which is now 10 years. And so I brought that up because it's in the heat of this... chance for the Nuggets to finally get out of the Western Conference for Jokic to be a three time MVP.

No team has won a title with a defense ranked 11th or worse in decades

No NBA team has won the championship with a defense that's ranked 11th or worse in the regular season in a very long time... The Denver Nuggets are not checking that box. So... you get exposed if you play Giannis in a seven game series.

UConn's program was a mess academically and behaviorally when I first arrived

I took that job at UConn and like, it was a disaster, man. I mean like, like talent, like the way these guys were, were, were moving on campus at like, academics behavior. It was so far away from like, anything you could win with, it's just everything was a mess.

Stan Musial invented the fist bump

I learned something the other day. I don't know if you guys heard this. Do you guys know who invented the fist bump? Stan Musial invented the fist bump. How crazy is that?

St. John's has no backup plan if they don't land Rick Pitino

St. John's has no secondary candidate. St. John's knows that in order to restore relevance, it needs Rick Pitino... St. John's has done that through back channels to his representatives. So now it's just a matter of if St. John's can obviously get a deal done.

The first six seasons of Jersey Shore were 100% real

It was all fucking real. Yeah, all six seasons. ... When we shot those seasons, we were in a house 24/7 cameras everywhere for a full month. So you got to see everything. You didn't need to make anything up.

NFL owners are colluding to prevent Lamar Jackson from getting a fully guaranteed contract

I think it's less about you need an agent and the collusion is more about the fact of nobody wants to pay him a guaranteed contract. Like the owners are so pissed off about the Deshaun Watson deal. Yes. And they know that Lamar wants a fully guaranteed contract. So I think if, if collusion is happening and there's like, there's a good chance that the owners are colluding on this, it's just to the point we're not gonna give this guy anybody else guaranteed five year deal.

Sloth bears are more vicious than honey badgers

I've been going on a deep dive and rabbit hole on sloth bears. They're the most vicious animal on earth. I think more vicious than a honey badger. They fight tigers and tigers are literally scared of them.

Aaron Rodgers is the first domino in the NFL quarterback market

Everything's being held up right now by the quarterback in Green Bay. Yep. But he is outta the darkness. Once that happens, he's the first quarterback domino. Then all the other quarterback dominoes begin to fall.

The Bears' #1 pick is worth at least two first-rounders in a trade

To go from one to four. It, it's a minimum of two ones and then some and then some. Oh hell yes. Like it's, it's a lot.

The East River is full of prehistoric bison bones dumped by a developer

Dirty Water Don... he's found a bone. He found a jawbone of a steppe bison, which is just a prehistoric, gigantic bison. He found the jawbone in the East River. So that means that it is true. There were tons of bones dump there. It means that they're sniffing in the right place.

Tom Segura is on steroids

Tom Segura's on steroids. Yeah. Tom. Yeah. I can't believe people don't know that. No, no, no. He's been 270 pounds his whole life. And then last year he found 'discipline.' Sure, sure. Was it No, you don't think it's the proximity of him and Joe Rogan maybe happened the same fucking needles.

Hank has never correctly guessed the lottery ball

Never. Never... [Mepo] doesn't even know how he knew that it's just in his body and it came bursting out. Liar, liar style. Just like, no. And he's like, how did I know that?

No quarterback wearing a visor has ever won a Super Bowl

We've got a, a theory on this show. Well, it's not really theory, scientific fact that no quarterback that's wearing a visor has ever won a Super Bowl... mostly it's a swag. Yeah, right. Exactly... So if the Eagles do lose, maybe we think about getting rid of the [visor].

Jalen Hurts is definitively a franchise quarterback and no one can say anything bad about him

Jalen Hertz did look really good. Jalen Hertz was phenomenal. That's, that's one thing that you can walk away is being like, no one can say anything bad about Jalen Hertz anymore.

I'm the greatest defender ever for a single season or game

For one single game? Or are you talking about for one single season that which player would you want? Because that's different. I mean, I'm, I'm never gonna argue for the longevity of my career... But for one season or one game, I, I'll, I'll put myself in that argument.

I am having a third child and I purposefully conceived to ensure it wouldn't be born during football season

I'm having another child, so congrats. Father three loading... early June... Are you purposely conceiving for the off-season? I mean, yeah... it's nice not having children during football season. I am a football guy.

The Bengals own the Kansas City Chiefs

The Bengals own the Chiefs. Three and oh is ownership. And they gotta be feeling pretty fucking good. It's tough to beat a team four times in a row.

Lane Johnson is healthy enough to lift a 325-pound man and his groin is fantastic

Lane Johnson I've heard is just, I heard that he lifted a 325-pound man off the ground today. And that his groin is just fantastic... [his] leg, thigh, groin, area is better than expected.

My 83-year-old father can bench press 225 pounds

Poolside [Mark's dad] is still 83 years old. I betcha he could get a couple reps with 225. 83 years old, 225... The dude is like, he'll send a picture... he's on top of a ladder on the front end loader at 83 years old, fixing a light bulb.

The Vikings were exactly the frauds we said they were all season

I don't wanna say we told you so. I don't either but we told you so... I don't think that I've ever been as right about a take as I have about Kirk Cousins the entire season. I was so Right that it fucking hurts.

I can hit 8 out of 10 free throws easily

Someone said, how many free throws would you make out of 10? I was like, in my day, I was a prolific free throw shooter... I can easily hit 8 outta 10. Might have been a little ambitious. I went four out of 10 the first time.

Tom Brady has won the Super Bowl every other year since 2013

Tom Brady's won the Super Bowl every other year since 2013. [2014, 2016, 2018, 2020].

Al Michaels eats a full fine-dining steak meal during the eight-minute halftime of Thursday Night Football

This dude, we get to halftime... He's got like steak, oh like shrimp. He doesn't touch the mashed potatoes but... they got real silverware and they got a plate and then, you know, you only have eight minutes at halftime in the NFL... Headphones are off back behind that screen and they got a table set and it's like fine dining for eight minutes and it's just, you know, he's eating and talking and yeah, it blew me away.