Takes

The Paris Gentle Mates Call of Duty event will be the biggest in history

Paris La Defense Arena. So it's got 45,000 seats. So they're, it's gonna be the biggest event in Call of Duty history... 45,000 seats. I that's pretty cool.

Lindsey Vonn crashes every single time she is hyped up to ski.

I basically, every time they say, 'Hey, Lindsey Vonn's about to ski'... she's gonna crash. I woke up and they were like, 'Hey Lindsey Vonn competed this morning and she crashed.'

The song 'Take Me Home, Country Roads' is about western Virginia, not the state of West Virginia

I gotta remind you, Big Cat, it's not about West Virginia. It's about West Virginia. Yes... It's about the Shenandoah Valley [which is in Virginia].

Optic Texas is officially back-to-back world champions and their greatness can't be denied

My Cool Throne this week goes out to the gentleman at Optic Texas. They defeated the Vancouver surge... back to back champions. First ever in history. Back to back champions. I'm not even Optic guy, but you can't deny greatness. Mercury back to back. Never been done.

Morgan Wallen is fully back after his recent controversies

Morgan Wallen... he had some controversies, you know, throwing a chair over their ledge... I just feel like he was a fantastic star. I think he's so back.

I connect with Peyton Manning because I am also a middle brother

What about you and your brothers playing the Manning Brothers? ...Part of me is like, yeah, I'd like to do that and I'd like to be Peyton. I feel like I connect with him as a middle, as a middle brother.

Taylor Swift would never allow Travis Kelce to propose to her on the field after a Super Bowl.

I was just thinking he wouldn't actually, after I said it, I realized Taylor would never allow it to happen. But I was thinking of like confetti. No, I just that that thought of all that scene disgusted me, but I don't think, I think they would do it in a little more classy way.

Nikocado Avocado's two-year weight loss reveal was a genius strategy

He's been posting videos for the last two years where he's large... then this week he posted a reveal stating that he prerecorded two years worth of mukbangs and has been putting them out periodically and just losing all the weight... this is actually incredible.

I am going to eat over 66 hot dogs and smash the world record against Kobayashi

I'm gonna smash [the record]. I'm gonna eat more hot dogs than ever before... Right now the over-under is like 66, and I'm gonna blow that out.

I would have made more money than any actor in history if I had accepted the lead in 'Avatar'

I had a chance to be in Avatar... I probably would've made more money than any actor in history had I taken the part... It was 10% of the total earnings from the film... All I know is it made over 3 billion.

Urban Meyer's brewery is putting out a Mexican lager with the laziest name possible

Urban Meyer's back. I just saw that he has an update to his brewhouse... It's called 'El Lager.' I just love it. It's like the laziest name you could come up with. It's like what Budweiser would put on their can of beers during Hispanic Heritage Month.

Joey Chestnut is the best eater of all time in the history of the world

Everybody eats. Joey Chestnut is the best person, the best eater of all time in the history of the world. He needs to be rich for that fact.

Taylor Swift fans did not invent 'gig tripping'; hippies have been doing it for decades

This is from the article. Gig Tripping Combines travel with music, with people willing to merge vacation plans with a music event... This is literally what hippies have been doing for decades. Decades and decades and decades.

Stevie Wonder is definitely blind because he missed Mariah Carey's hand at the Grammys

He presented an award to Mariah Carey this weekend and she walked up and he was left his hand shaking. [Mariah Carey] walked up and he was left his hand shaking... Stevie Wonder, confirmed [blind].

PMT should make Steamboat Willie t-shirts now that the character is in the public domain

Mickey Mouse is back because the original Mickey Mouse, Steamboat Willie just entered the public domain, meaning anybody can now use that version of Mickey Mouse in designs. So we should make a T-shirt. We should make Pardon My Take Mickey Mouse shirts.

I did not see anything supernatural on the plane

I did not see anything. What I mean, I think y'all knew that. No I did not... I got a bit of an altercation. It spiraled outta control... It was an expression of speech. I just was in my fields needed to get off that. I was highly distressed. Not a good look.

If Travis Kelce and Dr. Fauci don't accept Aaron Rodgers' debate challenge, they officially lose

Under debate laws, if Travis Kelce and Dr. Fauci do not accept the debate they have lost. That is how debates work online.

LOL is the most used acronym in the world

LOL is pound for pound the number one most used acronym of all. Most notorious. I put notoriety in there... mass appeal. MASS APPEAL.

Without the blues, there would be no rock and roll

Without blues, there'd be no rock and roll. That's a fact. That's a stone cold fact.

Tom Brady is "all natural" and would never date someone with a "fake body" like Kim Kardashian

She's got a fake body and Tom Brady would never do something like that. ... Tom Brady is a real man. He cares about family, brotherhood, love. ... Tom Brady's all natural himself.

The characters in Succession will always lose, and they should lose because they're dead inside

The cycle will continue. These people [the Roys] will always lose. They should lose. They're dead inside. And that's what you're gonna have to live with. I remember a friend of mine, they're in the middle of the season, he's like, I feel like I'm caring too much about all these characters now. I'm like, just hold away from, these guys are still gonna be [losing] at the end.

Mark Zuckerberg definitely got choked out during his Jiu-Jitsu competition despite his denials

The last thing you wanna do is have an update to the report being like, just so we're clear, we talked to multiple people. He was never choked out because now I'm like, dude, the guy got choked out. You don't have to update saying I wasn't choked out unless you were very clearly choked out.

Frank Dux, the real-life inspiration for Bloodsport, is the greatest liar of all time.

Frank Dux is the greatest liar of all time. All of it is fake. It is based on a true story, except Frank Dux lied about his fighting record as well as the existence of the entire tournament, as well as his military record. He just keeps lying about everything. Everything is made up.

Connor Roy was the only sibling with a real relationship with Logan Roy

Connor, that scene when they had the virtual dinner with dad thing that they watched that scene was basically showing all of us that Connor was the only one who had a relationship with his father that meant anything. Everyone, all the other three kids were just transactional. Like they want to be pa like the, the the next in line.

Bobby Knight once had his players stop a scripted play for the movie 'Blue Chips' because he didn't want to lose the possession

The director come in the huddle and he says, all right, we need about 15, 20 minutes to set up the last play. So Penny Hardaway is gonna throw the lob past the Shaquille O'Neill and then they win... As we're leaving the huddle to go play defense. Coach Knight says, 'Don't let him get it. Grab him.' So they run the play... We grab Shaq, the ball goes out of bound and he's yelling the director's yelling. Cut, cut, cut.

LeBron James is lying about when he started listening to Migos

LeBron today wore an outfit... a reporter asked him... he said 'I love Migos. I've been listening to them since I was in Miami in 2010.' The Migos didn't start putting music out until 2011 and they weren't really popular until 2013... just no reason to lie whatsoever.

Gisele Bündchen is furious that Tom Brady decided to un-retire and play another season

Gisele gave a very interesting interview earlier this week. She said like, 'I've been a good supportive wife now, it's my time.' Pretty much. She's so mad at Tom Brady for coming back, so mad. He was supposed to just be babysitting this year... then two weeks in the off-season, Tom's like, 'You know what, can you just watch the kids for another year?'

I grew up as a Chicago Bulls and Cubs fan

Chicago was Chicago. You got a hundred years of bears football almost right. You have the Chicago bulls. I grew up a bulls fan... and we could get WGN so we could watch, you know, Cubs, baseball, Harry Caray, you know, that was like iconic and bulls basketball. So we're like, so I grew up watching Chicago sports.

George Jetson was born on July 31st, 2022

My woe is on today... July 31st as we're taping it. This is the day that George Jetson was born on whoa. In the TV show The Jetsons. Whoa, whoa. That is whoa. And if you watch the Jetsons, we're like journeying throughout outer space, future conquering other solar... nothing's changed.

The term 'glow up' was created by Chief Keef

The term glow up, came from Chief Keef when he was like 16 [with] Glo Gang and his friends... he created that, but now it's like a very mainstream term.

The Will Smith slap meme will reach mass exposure quickly but will resurface during the NBA Finals

The countdown clock on [the meme] is finite. So like when Michael Jordan cried... it had a longer tail on it. This one it's like, okay, everyone's seeing it tonight and tomorrow. And then after that, it's going to take a big pause. I was thinking actually until football season, but when meme said NBA finals, he's absolutely right. The NBA finals are a hundred percent going to be ground zero for this move to resurrect.

I became bigger than the 'Van Wilder' movie

When I was young, I was like, I want to be bigger than that movie. So like, I wanna, I w I don't want that movie to be who people think I am. And I think I've gotten bigger than the movie. And so now it's like, it's a nice song. It's like a nice subplot in my story.

James Gunn maintains a 'no asshole' rule on his film sets

[James Gunn] also has a no asshole [rule]. And he puts together teams of people who there's not a bad apple in the bunch... I knew I was going to be surrounded by good people.

Magic Johnson doesn't physically write his own tweets

I found out that Magic Johnson does not physically do any of the tweets, which may explain some of it. It's articulated clearly across the room or while he's doing 17 other things as a titan of industry. And then there is a woman whose job is to figure out what he's talking about and make it a tweet.

Jackass Forever will be the start of a massive streak of movie hits.

Jackass Forever, the trailer came out... and I feel like it's just going to be hit after hit after hit after hit for the next few months because there's so much of a backlog [from the pandemic].

The internet trend of saying 'The Beatles suck' is objectively wrong

A decent amount of the internet is now just co-opted to take the Beatles suck and it blows my mind... You can say you don't personally like the Beatles... but saying they just suck is... the dumbest thing to say... Music that is occurring right now would not happen if it wasn't for the Beatles.

The 'You're not that guy, pal' clip will be the clip of the summer

Pretty much, it's a great clip, but I think that's going to be the clip of the summer. Everything you do with your friends, your coworkers, pretty much anything... you're going to see comments about you're not that guy.

The ironic resurgence of Harambe is due for a comeback

I think we actually are getting close to having it [Harambe] be funny again. The resurgence. Because it was very funny for that summer. Then it was like very lame. But now enough time has passed where if you just drop a Harambe, it's like, oh, that's actually kind of funny. The ironic resurgence of Harambe is due.

Ben Affleck was 'tampering' with J-Lo while she was engaged to A-Rod

Ben Affleck was tampering. Ben Affleck, it was reported, was texting J-Lo in February when J-Lo and A-Rod were still engaged. That is illegal. That is tampering.

Citizen Kane is no longer the best movie of all time according to Rotten Tomatoes

Someone that works at Rotten Tomatoes found an 80-year-old review... talking a negative review about Citizen Kane. So they put it in the Rotten Tomatoes whatever system, and now it's 99 on Rotten Tomatoes, not 100. Paddington 2 is 100. So Citizen Kane, by Rotten Tomatoes metrics, no longer the best movie of all time.

Drake's Scary Hours 2 tracks are currently holding the top three spots on the Billboard charts

Drake released three new songs last week, and they're now one, two, and three on the Billboard [Hot 100].

The National Anthem for Super Bowl 55 will go over the allotted time

I'm betting the over on [the National Anthem]. If you bet the under, then that's very anti-patriotic. You're a terrorist if you bet the under in the National Anthem.

The first recorded joke in history was a fart joke

The first recorded joke... was from the 19th century BC, 1900 BC. And it's a Sumerian joke... about a young bride who farts as she sits on her husband's lap.

Nick Mercs is actually under six feet tall and refuses to accept it

I'm over six foot easy though... and Nick [Mercs] is just, he's just, ever so under six foot and he really can't accept it. It's crazy.

'Eating your way out of town' is an underused and effective move for a player to force a trade

I choice not to look at any more angles of James Harden pictures... I choose to believe that James Harden is fat and I say more power to him. The eating your way out of town is the move that it's underused. And if all else fails and you want it to be traded, just put on a shitload of weight until people are embarrassed of you. And then guess what? You can always lose the weight.

Reality show cast trips are designed as 'pressure cabins' to force toxic conflict.

The trips are designed to put you in a pressure cabin together with everybody. To work through and bring up every issue... it's like a little mini forest fires that with any luck from production begin a big giant one big fire for the finale... it wouldn't matter where you are because it's going to be the most disgusting experience of arguments and toxicity.

I have died on screen more than any other actor in film history

I've died more than anybody in the film industry. I have the record. I think they said 63 deaths. That's a lot. God, that's crazy.

The Rudy story was largely embellished and many famous moments from the movie never happened

The Rudy story made a great movie and a lot of it was embellished. ... Locker rooms are pretty brutal anyway, but you know, I won't lie, Rudy's story made a great movie... I tell the truth but there are a lot of things that didn't happen. ... Did I tell him my jersey? No. ... Every time somebody says 'tell me about Rudy' I go, 'You really want to know about Rudy?' ... It made a good movie, but you know, there's a lot of things that didn't happen.

The movie 'Night at the Roxbury' was released before Billy Football was born

I guarantee you that movie [Night at the Roxbury] came out before Billy Football was born... It came out in 1998.

Jackass 4 will be a hit because the first week of production was explosive

We were one week into production where when she got shut down, but that's actually a good thing because that week was so barking explosive... in that one week we proved ourselves... there's full confidence for me that it's going to be a hit.