Takes

The US Men's National Team is soft and needs to play with more 'grit' to win the World Cup

We need more grit. Like that was the thing when watching the Gold Cup... we were soft. So if we suck at soccer, that's fine. We can't be soft and suck. And that was what I hated... Little grit. Little little push 'em around a little.

Soccer needs a rule change where the clock stops on all dead balls in the last 20 minutes

I think just if you made a rule last 20 minutes of the game, the clock stops when the ball goes out of bounds. Clock stops on every foul, every penalty. What's wrong with that?

Luis Suarez's passion for soccer is so high that he's still spitting on staff members in MLS games

I kind of admire Luis Suarez's passion in that he's still so fired up for soccer that he's spitting on an old guy in a Seattle Miami MLS game... that passion's never gone away. He just blacks out. I think that's why he's not retired from soccer.

Being an American soccer fan is the 'worst kind of guy you could be'

Being an American soccer fan is like, it's the, it's just the worst kind of guy you could be. Really? It's just the most [lame]. I live in Brooklyn, and I like footy. Like, it's just like shut up, you know.

Soccer is the most boring popular sport in the world

Soccer? Don't under don't understand. It's the most popular sport in the world. Yep. By far. Yep. And I watch a game and it seems so fucking boring. Like I get the moment that you get the goal is very fun. But every other moment in between it is like, when are they gonna fucking do something?

CONCACAF is rigged to ensure the United States doesn't win the Gold Cup

I join the chorus of those who were saying CONCACAF rigged. They don't want to see the United States win the Gold Cup. They'd much rather have it be Mexico.

The United States might actually just suck at soccer

So if [Pochettino] loses it's the, we might suck at soccer. Yeah, we might suck at soccer. Okay. I've been saying that.

Kylian Mbappé suing for 'lofting' is a loser move that confirms he is a bad hang

I Mbappé is suing PSG still for $60 million in unpaid wages. And he also claims that PSG lofted him... It involves isolating or leaving a player out from the main squad... it sounds like he's a bad hang. He might be suing PSG for being a loser... his lawsuit should be thrown out immediately because if you sue for lofting, you're actually immediately saying, 'this is why I got lofted.'

The World Cup belongs on the Mount Rushmore of professional sports playoffs

Mount Rushmore of Professional Sports Playoffs... I'm gonna go football. One. I'm gonna go basketball. Two. I'm gonna go, I'll go hockey. Three. I would like to go World Cup four if that's okay.

Sepp Blatter's acquittal proves FIFA is not a corrupt organization

Anyone that was pointing a finger at Sepp Blatter and saying that FIFA is corrupt... Guess what? You're wrong. He's been officially cleared. FIFA. It turns out, plot twist, not corrupt. Everything's above board in FIFA.

The current USMNT roster is the most talented the United States has ever had heading into a World Cup

The roster that we have right now... going into this World Cup, that is the best roster that the US will have ever had at that point. Just looking at the players that play competitively overseas, that's as talented as we've ever been.

Offsides should be removed from soccer

Offsides should be taken out of soccer. There should be no offsides.

The USMNT will never be great until the players care enough to fight fans in the stands

The United States will never be great at soccer until our players care enough to go into the stands and fight people from other countries. It just means more. That somehow a Malice at the Palace situation... these guys just fucking care about soccer.

NBA players would win the World Cup for the US in four months if they switched to soccer

If the Bucks decided that they wanted to be the US men's national team in soccer, we'd win a World Cup. No problem. Pick any sport. They'd be our best soccer player without a doubt. Give them four months.

Messi's assist against the Red Bulls was the craziest pass I've ever seen

Beat the Red Bulls scored another or no? Yeah. Unbelievable goal. Probably the craziest pass I've ever seen in the, in the sport of football... I think it was [better than his World Cup pass].

Lionel Messi is the best soccer player ever and the MLS might be rigged for him

Messy, he's a goat. We all know he's a goat and he just keeps proving that he's... Some people are saying MLS is rigged that they brought Messi over and they're letting him score all these goals because there's no way that the professional league can be that bad where [Messi] just steps in and dominates.

Expected goals is the biggest crock of shit stat in sports

I'm a big expected goals guy. You know the expected goals account that tweets out... how many goals you should have scored... that is maybe the biggest crock of shit stat in sports. It's like, well based on how you guys really played, you won two to nothing.

The US Women's National Team are 'entitled babies'

No, you shouldn't be celebrating like that after you tie Portugal. Zero. Zero. You only won one game against Vietnam... So act listen, you haven't won shit yet. They're entitled, they're entitled babies.

The USWNT's 3-0 victory over Vietnam was the worst three-goal victory I have ever seen

I watched the second half of the Vietnam game. That was bad. That was the worst three goal victory I've ever seen.

MLS team names like Inter Miami and Real Salt Lake are stupid

I fucking hate MLS team names. Yeah. Inter Miami... I love the entire aesthetic of Inter Miami... but it's just the team names are stupid when it's like inter Miami Ray Salt Lake. FC Sporting kc. Yeah. Gimme a fucking break.

Lionel Messi is the greatest walker of all time

[Lionel Messi] is elite at walking. He's the greatest walker of all time. They did a whole study about it and he spends the first five minutes just walking around, basically figuring out the weaknesses, weak points in the defense. A lot of times he'll be walking while everyone else is running and his gravity, the way that the defense has to move around to him just walking, changes the whole scope of the game.

The Saudi Arabian soccer league cannot compete with the MLS model of paying aging superstars

Basically they're just completely cucking the MLS's model, which is just pay aging superstars for a fuckload of money to come finish out their career over here. We can't compete with that.

The English Premier League is more exciting than American sports because of the high consequences of relegation and promotion

That's the beauty of it. That's why I love the English Premier League because it's relegation, it's promotion, the consequences are so much higher.

Cristiano Ronaldo is the GOAT

Ronaldo, my goat got benched. People don't like Ronaldo. I don't understand. ... Ronaldo's the goat, Messi's great but Ronaldo greater.

The USA vs England 0-0 draw was the greatest tie of all time and should be known as the 'Miracle on Grass'.

It was the best, the greatest tie of all time. The tie heard around the world. We were calling it the the Miracle on Grass. And it was incredible. ... I traveled halfway around the world with a singular mission to bring home a fucking tie to the United States. We did.

Paul Rabil retiring was the best thing to happen to professional lacrosse

Is it a coincidence that the PLL had their best year ever after Paul Rabil retired? Was Paul Rabil bad for professional lacrosse? Some are saying.

The 2022 Qatar World Cup is one of the worst overall sports tournaments in history

It's really one of the worst overall tournaments of all time ever... we're doing an entire world cup in the middle of the desert where we have to blast air conditioning and do the tournament in the middle of American football.

Lionel Messi is a better and more magical soccer player than Cristiano Ronaldo

I respect the amount of work that Ronaldo puts in... he's top notch pro. But Messi, I mean, what the guy has done on the field, it's magic. You don't see that in a player. And I don't know when, and if we will ever see a player that is quite like Messi again.

Michelle Akers is the greatest women's soccer player of all time

All time goats... I would say probably Michelle Akers. Yeah. She just—talk about somebody that would run through a brick wall, play on one leg if she had to, she scored in some of the biggest moments. She was definitely somebody I looked up to.

The hardest part of being a professional goalkeeper is the mental strength required to not dwell on mistakes.

As goalkeepers, if you make one mistake, it's usually going to end up as a goal... the hardest part is just like be mentally strong and not being, not thinking about making mistake or being negative because when that happens, you bounce back and mistakes [happen].

Premier League coaching and academies are night and day compared to the American system

When your kid and the academy system growing up over here in Europe, they just have such good coaching... Over here [Europe], there's just more purpose into training and playing the game. They know it better and they just understand it more than than I was taught growing up... when I was growing up to what I see over here, it was night and day.

Soccer is a joke because games are decided by penalty kicks with lasers in players' faces

I said that soccer is a joke. Like the fact that, you know, your spot at the world cup is determined by a fucking penalty kick with laser beams getting shot in your face is a joke.

NFL football takes priority over the USMNT World Cup games on Sundays

It's Sunday, we're here. We're watching games. You say, Hey, USA's about to play. You're not getting a TV and I'll watch the games. I'll watch every other, like when football's not on... but we have to, you realize that, right? Not a TV on a Sunday. You have to stand for something.

I don't believe the United States will ever be good at soccer

I just don't believe that we will win. It's that simple... I wish we were good at soccer. We're not. And I'm not gonna pretend like soccer matters in this country when it doesn't.

Liverpool is currently the best soccer team in the world

It's great just being able to walk around saying we are the best team in the world... Because we are... at the minute, the best team in the world. And it's fucking great to watch, lad.

Mo Salah is the best player in the world right now

And we've got the best player in the world at the minute in Mohamed Salah.

Lionel Messi has more God-given talent than Cristiano Ronaldo

Messi... Ronaldo's man-made, where Messi's God-given talent... Like Ronaldo's work for everything himself, where Messi was just given that talent, where when he's got that ball at his feet, it's like it's super glued to it.

Cristiano Ronaldo is the greatest soccer player of all time

Who is your goat in soccer? [Bolt]: Cristiano Ronaldo... from my experience from very far... Madrid, plus I know Manchester... Tom Brady proved to the world he's the one. Ronaldo proved he's the one.

Michael Bradley only plays for the USMNT because his dad was the coach

The fucking coach's son that just keeps getting [minutes]... He's a guy who gets to play on the US team because his dad was a coach.

Manchester United fans should feel dirty about Cristiano Ronaldo returning just to chase penalties

Cristiano Ronaldo is back at Manchester United... he basically last, last second of the transfer window [decided] 'where can I go get the most amount of penalties? I'm going to go back to Man U.' I, I don't, you know, Man U fans, you should feel dirty. You should feel bad about it yourself.

Nick Saban could make Alabama the number one soccer team in the world immediately

I know we joke, but if Nick Saban and the Alabama football team decided they wanted to be number one soccer team in the world, they would. Immediately. Zero training. Yes, they just would.

The U.S. women's soccer team sucks at soccer now

My hot seat is the U.S. women's soccer team because they lost and we stink... I tweeted about like, oh, we suck at soccer now.

The European Super League would have been sick and a great idea

I honestly kind of missed the idea of the super league. I, again, it's bad. We understand football's a sport. Everything else is a business, but super league would have been sick and low key. Imagine Man City against Barcelona on a Wednesday, like twice a year on a Wednesday that you would have. That's just a great idea. Great idea.

Gareth Southgate is to blame for England's Euro loss due to delayed substitutions

I think south gate [Southgate], I think you took too long to meet the changes because when you brought on stack off [Saka] is when they equalized... Sack [Saka] was 19. How'd you make it a 19 year old, 10 [take] the final penny [penalty]? How can you make a 19 year old?

Soccer should change the rules to prohibit scoring on a penalty kick rebound

I don't think you should be able to rebound a penalty in soccer... I just feel like you should get it if you miss it you miss it... If you miss it, you miss it. It's a fucking free throw.

English soccer fans have become the 'Bills Mafia' of international soccer

English soccer fans became Bills Mafia just by being so polite over the course of the years where they had these heartbreaking defeats that now you want to see them redeem themselves. They hit almost a fast-forward button on becoming lovable losers.

American sports owners like Stan Kroenke and the Glazers tried to turn European football into WrestleMania

And in came the American sports owners... Stan Kroenke, who it's not clear to me actually knows he owns Arsenal... you've got the Glazers... and they've got ideas... it was a bit like that old sci-fi show V where we welcomed in the aliens who seem nice... to try and turn what is precious, what has grown over a century, just that evolution, the history, the traditions, and to try and turn that into WrestleMania was a bit dark.

Cristiano Ronaldo is not a top three Ronaldo

It's time that we have an honest conversation about Ronaldo. I don't even think he's a top three Ronaldo. You've got Ronaldo, you've got Ronaldinho, who is named Ronaldo... Fat Ronaldo. He's number six overall Ronaldo.

Calling off the Denmark vs. Finland match after Christian Eriksen's collapse was the right move.

They called the game off, which was probably the right thing to do... then Christian Eriksen gets on a zoom call... tells them, I want you guys to play the game. Then they went out there and played.

The European Super League would actually have been sweet because of the high-level matchups.

The Super League kind of would have been sweet. ... Imagine if there was just a Wednesday, like every Wednesday afternoon, just the best teams in the world playing each other. ... would you watch because it's going to be sweet. They'd be like, yeah, I'd watch. ... It would have been fucking sweet.