Takes

AI technology is failing because it doesn't justify its investment costs

I think AI is in hot water. I feel like this is, we're we're in a good spot as humanity right now where AI has not been making enough money to justify all the investment. ... We might beat the robots.

AI is overhyped and will likely ruin everyone's life

I don't get the hype on ai. I feel like at best it's gonna just like, ruin everyone's life. Except for like a few people who will make all the money... I don't get why anyone is like pro ai... this could be really bad for everyone.

Pay-per-view is definitely not dead

Pay-per-view isn't dead. I mean, I'm gonna do a pay-per-view this Saturday. And when we were doing this deal, you know, even with the streaming services that we were talking to all the different ones, some of them still had pay-per-view options. So pay-per-view is not dead. That's not true.

It is a red flag that prominent NBA owners are cashing out right now

Isn't it interesting that the Lakers got a screaming good deal on what's going to be the face of their franchise for the next 10, 15 years right before they sold? ... Mark Cuban sold the Dallas Mavericks, the Celtics got sold... Is that a good sign for every other owner if all the preeminent owners are selling their teams right now? ... Are we hitting the bubble?

Sports owners should be forced to sell if their team doesn't make the playoffs for five consecutive years

I think they should have a new rule in own, in, in all sports that if, what call it five years, if you don't make the playoffs in five years, automatic sale. Like whatever the threshold is, that would be awesome. 'cause relegation is never gonna come to American sports. But if you could relegate owners that would be sick.

Josh Harris is the greatest owner in sports

Josh Harris, great owner. Some would say the best owner in sports, right Max? Ownership. The process has worked... credit to Josh Harris.

Bill Chisholm is a smart business mind and will be a great owner for the Celtics

Clearly a very smart business mind. And I'm excited to, to see what he's got in store. Hopefully he likes the Celtics and isn't doing this as a business.

Power Slap is the most successful business I have ever been part of in such a short time

The most successful business I've ever been a part of in such a short amount of time. [Power Slap]

The Chicago Bears are the most under-marketed entity in American commerce

I don't believe that there is a more under-marketed entity in American commerce than the Chicago Bears... in this city... it's a football town... and with the Bears, you know, in '85 and like that was, it was just, it engulfed everything. And they've been living off it since.

Boeing should be on a hotter seat

Boeing explodes during maintenance at an Atlanta airport killing two Delta employees. I feel like they should be on a hotter seat. I wish I knew if I was flying on a Boeing or not... allegesly. But don't kill me.

NFL owners should pay for their own stadiums without public tax money

I think billionaires should pay for their own fucking stadiums. Agreed. That's a spicy take. I know. Bleep that out. Please.

Naming a company 'MegaCorp' guarantees you will eventually try to destroy the Earth

If you name your company MegaCorp, at some point in the history of your company, you will try to destroy the earth.

Take $500,000 over a dinner with Jay-Z

[$500,000]. Because most likely Jay-Z has said it a million times in various different ways. So it would be like me saving $500,000 just to spend two days looking at every single interview he's ever done... why do I need to listen to him? I could save $500,000.

Sam Bankman-Fried was exposed as the biggest dork alive after his arrest

It's the fact that like to the regular world, I count myself in that where I'm not really into crypto. He just got exposed as being the biggest dork alive. Like I saw a picture of him and I heard his voice and I was like, this guy's a fucking dork.

Jeff Bezos hates fat people, poor people, and people with weak bladders

I'm pretty confident in saying Jeff Bezos hates fat people. He hates poor people. It's people who have like weak bladders, he hates. There's a lot of people that Jeff Bezos finds disgusting. That's a fact.

Beachfront spray kiosks for sunscreen would be a 'godsend' invention

I have a beach idea. ... it's a spray tan booth, but it's got sunscreen, spray sunscreen in it. So you just walk through it, they set up like a kiosk and you walk through it on your way out to the beach. You pay like 10 bucks and then you turn around like your Tony Hawk, your entire body gets coated in sunscreen. I feel like for kids, especially if you got kids, this is like a godsend of an invention.

The BMW 'Electric Avenue' was one of the three best commercials of Super Bowl 56

For me, the cars dominated this year's broadcast. One of them, obviously I have to award it to the electric avenue, BMW commercial for Zeus and the other. I like the Austin Powers one.

Robert Kraft's investment in a Call of Duty team is a genius move

Robert Kraft bought a Call of Duty team... everyone says that buying these roster spots is a waste of money... I would have agreed with them until Robert Kraft bought the top spot. Now genius investment.

Hot fashion brands typically only last five to seven years

The cycle of generally for fashion, a hot fashion brand lasts about five to seven years. There's a unicorns like Nike and Louis Vuitton. But you'll notice whether it's Benetton or Levi's... [they] chip away.

The only way to make real money in the stock market is to hold for 20 years

If you buy something on one of those [Robinhood/Ameritrade], the real way you're going to make money is to hold it for 20 years. If it's a value. But if you buy it, you naturally look at your account and you go back and go, 'oh, I'm Gordon Gekko. I just made $200. Let me sell it.'... It takes away your discipline.

AEW exists because WCW vacated the prime TNT/TBS television slot

AEW exists, in my opinion, because of the failure of WCW because they vacated this great time slot, this great relationship with TNT and TBS that we have. And that was the success of WCW was the outlet, the penetration they had from TNT, TBS, and, of course, the fans.

Car dealerships are all bullshit and haven't changed in years

The car dealerships have never changed. They advertise what they do, but it's all bullshit... I really believe if I went into one of these dealerships, not so much that I could sell cars, but I could show them what the fuck is wrong with what you're doing.

Every major corporation needs a consultant specifically to identify if an idea will be mocked by the internet

It made me realize that I have job security no matter what in life in that every team and corporation should have on staff a person who essentially is just there to say, 'Hey, will we get made fun of for this?'... our, 'Will the internet make fun of you for this?' is absolutely a job we could do.

Fear of missing out (FOMO) is the correct reason to get into Bitcoin or Top Shot

If the only reason you're getting into it is a fear of missing out, that's the wrong reason? No, no, no, no. That's exactly the only reason to get in. The only reason to get into all of these things is that you don't want to someday be pumping the gas for a fucking Bitcoin billionaire's boat.

The 'Reddit millionaires' will be the funniest class of millionaires ever

I need the quote-unquote trolls of the internet... to be the power players and shift the entire dynamic... the Reddit millionaires are going to be fucking hilarious.

The stock market 'pause button' was hit only to save the fat cats

The game's rigged. They literally rigged it in plain sight... The fat cats in Wall Street are basically going to figure it out, going to blame the small guy, going to make new rules. Like, we've already seen it.

Bitcoin investors will die rich but never spend their money because they are obsessed with holding

The whole point of being rich is to spend money and do cool shit. Bitcoin people just... in the next 10 years it's going to be the only currency that exists. There's going to be at least a few people who die and they're like... worth 100 million dollars. They didn't spend any of it.

Success is the only thing that separates a visionary from a fool

The difference between being a visionary and a fool is success. If it happens, you're a visionary. You're brilliant, right? Well, if it doesn't happen, you're an asshole.

HP has the worst customer service in the human race

I prepared on my Twitter account this morning thing that says about HP the worst cutting height I put him in quotations—customer service the worst in the human race. Whoa. And I could hurt so many people.

Tesla for Tables: A self-leveling table technology

Tesla for tables... the table itself feels the surface around it and then adjusts so that there's never any wobble... every restaurant I go to has a set of wobbly table. All those tables wobble.

The 'Soup Tube' business idea is an absolute wave of the future

I would pay, I'd probably have like five or six different soup tubes installed in my kitchen right now... Out of the Monday readings we've done, Dave & Buster's guys is number one... Soup Tubes is number two... I would unironically purchase this.

Opening a bar with your best friend is the quickest way to end the friendship

Most stories that take a turn start with the sentence 'and then we opened a bar together.' It's like, and then we opened a bar together and everything in our life like as friends as brothers went downhill. If you want to hate your best friend, open a bar with him.

Business is the ultimate competition and much harder than professional sports

In basketball, you compete for 48 minutes. You practice a couple hours. You guys know in business, it's 24 by 7 by 365, and everybody's trying to kick your ass. Everybody's trying to come after you, and you got to battle all the time. Sports are easy, easy. Business is the ultimate competition.

The secret ingredient to success is how long a person takes to feel sorry for themselves after a failure

When I really analyzed over the years what a secret ingredient is... it was exactly what you just said: how long they take to feel sorry for themselves... It's how long it takes. Some say 'oh poor me' and some get right back up.

I can sense the 'aura of success' or failure in a person before they even speak.

I can actually tell now when they step out on that carpet... and at that moment I can sense their aura. And I know exactly whether we have winners or losers. They don't even have to say anything. I'm right a hundred percent. I can now at this point sense the aura of success or losers.

Fortunes are made by creating products that make people say 'why didn't I think of that' combined with luck

The biggest fortunes are made with two things something that somebody does where everybody says fuck why didn't I think of that and then you need a little bit of luck... I made a shitload of money because I was lucky to stock market was happening.

Gold is more valuable than money

I'm going to go with something better than money, gold. [Gold is more valuable than money.] It is.

Clothing companies should manufacture pants with built-in iPhone chargers in the pockets

I have a really good drunk idea... It's shorts that have an iPhone charger built into the pocket... You plug your pants into the wall... It's a Mophie that you can wear.

Sports only drive bar business about 70 days a year

Sports will only fill a bar about 70 days a year... And a lot of people think, oh, but a sports bar, they come every night. That's not true. They don't come for every baseball game, only postseason. They don't come for every NBA game, only postseason...tops 70, 80 days.

Women over 34 need backs on barstools, while younger women prefer stools without them

When you have women over 34, you put her back on a barstool... Under 34, you don't. And the reason why is over 34, women get very sensitive about their asses... Under 34, I want you to spin around for interactivity.

Mark Zuckerberg is going to run the world and we should all start bootlicking him now

The guy who just stole the world's privacy and helped rig elections is now going to control our money... I'm going to start bootlicking the shit out of Mark Zuckerberg because he's going to, like it or not, he's going to run the world. So you might as well get on his side early.

Sports owners focus much more on winning than making money

I think most owners in sports are much more focused on winning than they are making money from the business... I think they think winning first. And if you win, then profits follow.

Bank of America is a terrible company with archaic technology

I'm dealing with the hated Bank of America... Can you imagine Bank of America cannot email things. They can only fax a guy... They sound like you [Big Cat]. My son told me... anybody that uses a fax is by definition an idiot.

Lori Greiner is the scariest Shark on Shark Tank

I'm always afraid of Lori. We're kind of in the same space of bringing consumer products to the market. And she has two platforms. She has a very strong platform with QVC. And she's also, if it's a woman-related product, she can be the face of it... I always have to have a tussle with Lori.

Mark Zuckerberg is an unlikable robot with a shitty haircut

I don't know why that guy, [Zuckerberg], he has such an unlikable face. He walks on stage already bombing. It's like the guy before him killed and then the second they just, I don't know if it's the guy's face, his posture, his energy, it's just everybody would hate him. He's a robot. He's got those big pupils that just look like nothing but just black in those eyes. Wrong haircut.

NFL owners should pay for their own stadiums without taxpayer money.

The owners should pay for their own fucking stadium. A segment that we'll throw out there... If the taxpayers pay for the stadium, they get to decide the rules. No laws inside the stadium. Anything you want.

Elon Musk is a total fraud.

I'm so here for Elon Musk, like, just having meltdown after meltdown because everyone realizes he's a fraud and, like, promising people to go to Mars. ... Elon Musk... Total fraud.

Partnering with someone who cheats on their wife is a bad business move

Somebody said to me, man, don't be partners with somebody who would cheat like that because he'll screw you in a heartbeat... I went into business with the guy... he ripped me off over 500 grand.

People with the biggest egos usually have the thinnest wallets

Ever notice that people with the biggest ego have the thinnest fucking wallet? Because he doesn't listen to anybody. His ego gets in the way, they're typically not very successful.

Rookies should invest all their money into their bodies and skills rather than the market

My advice to them would be invest as much money into yourself, your body, your food. Focus on becoming a better player because there's nothing in the world that's going to be a better return on your investment than making yourself a better player. That second contract... you're worth $100 million.