Takes

TJ Watt is definitively the best defensive player in football

For anybody who's been watching the NFL this year or the past three years... the best defensive player in football has been TJ watt. It's a fact.

Rushing Fall is the horse to watch in the Friday Breeders' Cup races

There's a horse named Rushing Fall, trained by Chad Brown... She's had two starts. She won them both. Last time out, she looked like an absolute superstar. I think she is on her way to maybe some spectacular things.

Ohio State will beat Oregon in the Rose Bowl

The Rose Bowl's gonna be awesome. I think I'm gonna take Ohio State in that game. And it's mostly based on the uniforms that Oregon picked. I didn't really like 'em, I thought they should have done more classic.

Jalen Carter will not fall out of the top 10 in the draft

I'd be shocked, shocked if Jalen Carter fell out of the top 10. The Seahawks at five, Jalen Carter's a perfect fit... You go right down to the Eagles at 10.

The NFL should adopt a hybrid draft format where the first round is live but later rounds are remote

If they can do a blend if they could do a hybrid it would be perfect. I would want the first round live with people in the draftees in the spot... but I agree with you like if we could do rounds 4 through 7 where everyone is remote and you can see into the room like living rooms of all the coaches and GM's that was fascinating.

Bruce Arians is a 'Rhino Hunter' who loves signing old, veteran quarterbacks

Bruce Arians did say he prescribes to analytics... and he does like older quarterbacks. So he's kind of like a cougar hunter... Bruce Arians is definitely a rhino Hunter. Yes, because he liked Carson Palmer, loved Peyton Manning. He likes these old guys.

J.J. Watt will never actually come on the show

If I'm putting money on it, I'm saying that he's not going to come on the show and that he's just doing this as a one-time thing to try to get a brief amount of credit but not really following up on it.

I hope Draymond Green doesn't get suspended for the nut kick because playoff basketball is better with fights and retaliation

The question is, is Draymond going to get suspended for that kick? Because it was a crane kick. It was a Karate Kid shot to the balls. And I hope he doesn't get suspended because I'd like to see some retaliation. That's when playoff basketball really takes off is when there's fights and retaliation.

The Dolphins are officially on 'Fraud Watch' until they beat a real team like the Chiefs

The Dolphins are not frauds. They're on fraud watch. The teams they have beaten are the Chargers, the Patriots twice, the Broncos, the Giants and the Panthers. They have to win a game... against this Chiefs game will be the huge test for them.

Watching Super Bowl tape as motivation before a rematch is a bad move by Kyle Shanahan

Kyle Shanahan forced the team to watch the Super Bowl this week and said, I think everyone understands that we've lost two Super Bowls [to] them. So, I mean, that can give you a little post-traumatic stress when you turn on the tape. I don't know. I don't know if I like that. ... In what world does that improve morale? Zero. I I guess you could just hope that it's gonna piss 'em off.

I'm officially done with watching Desmond Ridder play football

I'm so sick of watching Desmond Ridder play football. I know he played well in the fourth quarter... but the interception, the fumble in the end zone, the missed pass to Bijon [Robinson] where it was a walk-in touchdown and he missed him. I'm just kind of done with watching him play football. We've had enough.

The Patriots defense is never better without JJ Watt

When you have the best defensive player in the league, your defense is going to never be better without him.

NFL points are a finite resource; scoring 70 means you'll have fewer points later

I feel like points are a finite resource... They might have scored too many points last week [scoring 70]. Too many points.

JJ Watt will spend hundreds of thousands of dollars on thank-you ads for Houston

I think that there's probably at least like $300,000 or $400,000 that [JJ Watt] has earmarked right now to take out full-page thank you ads to the entire city of Houston. He's probably going to be buying billboards all over Texas, thanking them for his time there.

Mules are better workers than horses or donkeys

Mules are sterile and they're actually better workers than horses or donkeys. They're way better than horses. [How do they get born?] It takes one horse and one donkey. There's also zorses, that's a horse and a zebra.

The Red Sox Apple Watch scandal is good for baseball because it fuels the Yankees rivalry

Baseball needs rivalries. Red Sox-Yankees has been simmering. This kind of brings it up a notch.

Deshaun Watson has the worst contract in NFL history

Deshaun Watson will go down as the worst contract ever.

J.J. Watt being healthy is the official sign that football is back

you know football is back because there's a lot of buzz about J.J. Watt not being injured... J.J. Watt being like, is this the year that J.J. Watt can stay healthy all year? That means football is officially back.

Sovereignty is a much better workhorse at Churchill Downs than he has been in the past

One of those kind of horses... is Sovereignty trained by Bill Mott, stretch runner Godolphin second in the Florida Derby. He is always been just a very average workhorse, and he's looked a lot better in the morning here at Churchill Downs than he has in the past.

Lamar Jackson will not get a fully guaranteed contract like Deshaun Watson's

No, you're not gonna fully guarantee. You can give him a lot of guaranteed money... He wants the Deshaun Watson deal. From what I heard and that they're not gonna fully guarantee. The owners in this league don't want to fully guarantee contract. They were all mad that they did that in the first place.

Switching from quarterback to wide receiver was like discovering my true self

I got to college and, you know, there's a lot of new things... you try some new things, try new positions in college... I was out on the field, and I caught a ball. Yeah, it felt right. I wasn't wearing gloves. Skin on skin. You always remember your first ball.

J.J. Watt released the first-ever non-retirement announcement for a retirement nobody expected

J.J. Watt just had the first ever non-retirement announcement. No one was wondering if he was retiring. But he's like, hey, guys, if any of you are wondering, yeah, I'm not retiring.

Amar'e Cooper wants out of Cleveland

Amari Cooper wants out. He does not want to be there anymore.

The Cowboys trade for Amari Cooper was a ballsy move that worked

The Amari Cooper trade, when we laughed at it and everyone laughed at it, that was a fucking ballsy move, and it has worked out. Amari Cooper has basically re-found himself.

The Washington Generals have a better winning culture than the Redskins have had for the last 30 years

They've been so bad that the name Washington Generals is more aligned with a winning culture than the Washington Redskins has been for the last 30 years. ... We've tried everybody, we've tried everything possible. Let's Rebrand.

J.J. Watt could fix his image by doing 'dizzy bat' and falling on his face

He needs to play a round of drunken dizzy bat because you always fall on your face... Not only is he like, okay, he's a regular guy... He also will fall on his face and will laugh about that. And if he can laugh at himself after that, I mean, he's right back in everyone's good graces.

Oregon is going to destroy Liberty in the Fiesta Bowl

17 points is not nearly enough points. They're so strong... They're way bigger than Liberty. So I'm hammering Oregon this weekend.

We are banned from the Beacon Theater because of James Dolan

Part of my take was slated to do a live show in New York city at the beacon theater... I just got information that that date has been pulled from us because James Dolan owns the beacon theater. And we are the fucking bad boys of podcasting. We're banned from the beacon theater because of James Dolan.

Skip Bayless is the biggest Luka Doncic hater on the planet

My new favorite takeout there is how skip Bayless is now the biggest Luka hater on the planet, on the fucking planet. He's kind of, he's doing that exact same thing where he just like, he cherry picks the perfect stats to talk about Luka. He's like, he will not forget the games that the Mavericks lost in this series.

NFL ratings will be insane this season despite hater predictions

All you fucking haters out there who say the NFL... Guess what? The NFL's back, and there's a shitload of us watching it. We love it... Ratings are going to be insane.

There is a greater than 50% chance Dan Snyder is forced to sell the Washington Football Team

I'd say once somebody with the power to get to the bottom of it gets involved [Congress], it gets north of 50... Once we know about some of the things that Beth Wilkinson, the investigator found, yeah, I think it becomes untenable at that point publicly for Snyder to continue.

The 'sports are better with fans' honeymoon phase will end by Thanksgiving

We're in a nice honeymoon phase where it is incredible to turn on a game and just be like, oh, my God, this is awesome... I think sometime around Thanksgiving, if you're still doing that, if you're still pointing out the extremely obvious sports are better with fans, you're late to it.

A modern hitter will never hit .400 again because of the prevalence of specialized relief pitchers.

No, I don't think [hitting .400] is [going to happen again]. I think there's too much specialty in pitching... You've got a guy, a lot of the three, four, five starters, you get five innings... Then they bring in a guy that's making probably $6 million a year to pitch the sixth, maybe the seventh.

The media will soon claim that sports were better without fans in the building

I'm going to level it up. I'm going to say by the time you're hearing my voice, if it's in the afternoon tomorrow... somebody will have already written the take that sports were better when there were no fans in the building.

The 2021 Final Four will likely be the lowest-watched in history because it lacks traditional blue-blood programs

This is going to be, not that we care, but there are people who care, probably the lowest watch final four. Right. You don't have any traditional blue bloods... you don't have any Big Ten. You don't have any ACC.

Deshaun Watson will start fewer than two more games in his NFL career.

So is Deshaun Watson over under starts Deshaun Watson has the NFL for the rest of his career. Three and a half. I was gonna say one and a half. Maybe like a random.

Golden State is better with Kevin Durant than without him

So you think that they're better with Kevin Durant? Yeah, for sure. I mean, I think they were better this year than they were.

UNC is the most fun team to watch in college football

I think UNC might be the greatest team to watch in college football. There's so I feel like it's just gonna, you wanna talk about maximum chaos? I feel like that's gonna be UNC every single weekend.

Pete Carroll is a cheater for lying on injury reports

My hot seat is Pete Carroll, coach of the Seattle Cheahawks. Got caught cheating... by lying about his injury report saying Richard Sherman, he had an injury the whole season, and he basically lied on the injury report every single week... his crime was lying and cheating.

The Houston Texans are definitely not better off without J.J. Watt

How could you be better without [J.J. Watt]? You know, no matter what people think about him off the field, on the field, he's a pretty darn good player. Now you put him with Mercilus and Clowney, it'll be interesting what happens. So to say the Texans would be better with him off the football field, I don't think is—that's just [the PMT] hot take.

Oregon is the most under-seeded team in the 2021 NCAA tournament

The most under-seeded team in the 2021 NCAA tournament is Oregon... Dana Altman, the master of the Rubik's Cube... This team is more talented than its seed. I think they're a very difficult matchup for Iowa. I have a big Pac-12 breakthrough... I've got Oregon going to the second weekend.

Deshaun Watson has the worst contract in the history of sports

Deshaun Watson already had the worst contract in football, probably in history... It just further proves how horrifically awful the Deshaun Watson contract was.

The Miami Hurricanes and Texas Longhorns are on the fraud watch list

I don't think it's fair for us to put Miami on the fraud list just yet after one week. Let's put them on a watch list... questionable Miami. I would say Texas is also questionably fraud.

Deshaun Watson's $230 million guaranteed contract is going to be one of the worst in NFL history.

Deshaun Watson is gonna be in the running for worse contracts of all time. $200 million guaranteed has not been able to stay on the field. The Browns have a roster that is Super Bowl worthy, and now he's missing the rest of the year. And they're going to be having to fend off the AFC north with DTR, PJ Walker.

I couldn't take movie roles because playing a different character would ruin the Undertaker persona

I turned down other outside projects because to me, my mindset on this whole process was like I can't go and do a movie where I'm a different character and then come back and then try and be Undertaker. It was just too big of a disconnect.

Sammy Watkins is in a cult

My cool throne is Sammy Watkins being in a cult. ... As we've been speculating, we've been squatting on the take that Sammy Watkins is in the cult for like the last three years on the show. Sammy really... talked about all the weird stuff. ... So now he's happy that he's in a cult.

The Pro Bowl has reached a point where it is more fun to joke about than to actually watch

I think it's reached a point where it stinks so bad that it's more fun to joke about the Pro Bowl.

I'm officially on nervous watch that the Packers are going to make a run

I'm officially on—I'm nervous watch. I'm nervous that they're [the Packers] going to make a run. I change my—Packers fans know me well enough that I start to change my tone when I start to get really nervous... knowing that they're better than [their record].

TJ Watt is the Defensive Player of the Year

TJ Watt is defensive player of the year. And I know there's a lot of guys out there that could probably win it. He had three and a half sacks today... TJ Watt now has played 10 games this year. He has 16 sacks in 10 games. That's insane... TJ Watt definitely has moments where he just completely takes over a game... There's my vote.

Eli Manning is a prankster who likes to crop dust and fart on teammates

Eli is the kind of guy, like, he's definitely smart, but, like, likes the pranky, slapsticky type stuff. And, like, it'll just – he'll be sitting down in a meeting or something talking to someone, and he'll kind of crop dust you or just, like, drive by, fart you, and then just walk away. He's a big fart guy, yeah.