Takes

Connor McDavid's specialty is winning individual MVPs while losing championships

Connor McDavid winning MVP of the entire Olympics in another losing effort. That's just what he does now. It is funny that this is now twice McDavid has won MVP in a losing effort. That's his thing. That is officially his thing. Anytime I play in a big game, I'm gonna be the best player. Not that I'm gonna win it, but the best player out there.

Lindsey Vonn crashes every single time she is hyped up to ski.

I basically, every time they say, 'Hey, Lindsey Vonn's about to ski'... she's gonna crash. I woke up and they were like, 'Hey Lindsey Vonn competed this morning and she crashed.'

Mike McDaniel was cursed by the football gods for not breaking the NFL scoring record against the Broncos

2023 Dolphins scored 70 points. Mike McDaniel chose not to go for the NFL record at the end of the game. Did not kick a field goal. I believe the football gods cursed him after that moment. The Dolphins went 23 and 25 after that. The Broncos went 32 and 16 after that moment.

The Raiders are the worst team in the NFL

The Raiders are the worst team in the league. I agree. I know. I do not think that there's a debate for it. They're one of the worst teams like ever. It's crazy watching 'em play.

The Chiefs are more 'dead' for the future than the Cowboys

I think it's the Chiefs. I think it's the Chiefs for the now and for like the immediate future... They're $32 million over the cap for next year. How do you rebuild the offensive line... The defense has fallen off the face of the earth... I just think like this is a, a little bit, I don't know if it's just a snap my fingers and all of a sudden we're back... where it's like, if you're Dallas offensive line's really good and cheap, the the receivers are ridiculous.

The Kansas City Chiefs will miss the playoffs

Memes, did you say that maybe the Chiefs won't make the playoffs? I did. You wanna stand on that? Sure. Okay. Chiefs won't make the playoffs. Oh, you're saying the Chiefs won't make the playoffs. Whoa.

Justin Fields is finished as a starter in the NFL and plays like a 'scared puppy'.

Justin Fields got benched in this game. Feels like that's done right? Yeah, that's done. He's he's just a scared puppy out there. ... every single defense is just setting new single season records when he's playing in sacks.

Texas Tech is easily the best team in the Big 12 right now

I think they're clearly the best team in the Big 12... I think Texas Tech outclass them, everybody in that conference by a mile.

Wisconsin football is in a dark place and may not win another game this year

We're in a lot of trouble. A lot of trouble. Like dark, dark times... I don't know if they're gonna win another game this year.

The Denver Broncos are a beauty queen with a dead tooth in her mouth

The Broncos right now... a good analogy for this is a beauty queen with a dead tooth in her mouth. You walk up to her, she looking at you, then you start to talk to her and you be like, yeah, I see why now. See that dead tooth in your mouth? That had just killed everything I felt before I got here.

Game 7 is a legacy game for the Thunder and Thunder Princess

I'm calling it tonight. This is a legacy game. Game seven for Thunder and Thunder Princess. This is what it's all about. ... If the Thunder win this game seven, then they're gonna have to answer questions for the rest of their lives about how they tarnished their legacy with this NBA championship.

The Anthony Richardson experience in Indianapolis might already be over

Anthony Richardson is hurt another shoulder injury to the quarterback... I feel like this could be Daniel Jones... I just feel like the Anthony Richardson experience might be over.

Alex Ovechkin should not have been on the power play during Game 5

Ovy did not look well on the ice tonight. He looked pretty slow... I almost think that he shouldn't even be on the power play right now. Because he wasn't, he did not look like he was moving around like the Ovy that we saw in the regular season.

Jimmy Butler's era as 'Playoff Jimmy' is officially over

is this the death of playoff, Jimmy? ... He, the last two games he took 20 shots total. ... He's going to be 36 before next year. He's playoff Jimmy done.

The horse Mystik Dan (Sovereignty) is a 'beta' and a pussy for skipping the Preakness

I'm saying I'm gonna prank call sovereignty. I we should harass this horse. This is a beta horse. This is what happens. It's a horse that's been coddled its entire life... accomplished one thing... This horse is a fucking pussy.

James Harden is the biggest choker in NBA history

Is he the biggest choker? I don't know if it's choker or just Bright lights scares him away guy of all time because at this point it is now four different teams that he's done this with. It is, he's great in the regular season. He can be great in the beginning of a series... But then when the Bright, the lights get the brightest and it's game seven, he's a complete no show. And it's, it's not even, there's not even a debate anymore. I think he is [number one all time].

Carolina cannot win the Cup because Sebastian Aho is not a true superstar

Carolina fans are kind of all always all over biz. And I, and I gave them a bunch of props... and all those fans tell me aho aho I'm like, I love aho. But I just, he's like one little notch beneath like the true superstars. And, and so I don't, I don't even think if Carolina gets by Washington, like they can win the cup.

The NBA should stop the Eastern Conference playoffs because the Celtics are just going to eat everyone

Can we just stop with the Eastern conference playoffs? Can we just not do 'em? Because what's happening is every team is just kind of getting fattened up to get eaten by the Celtics and a delicious snack. Like that's what's gonna happen.

Zach Hampel is the best of all time at ball-hawking and deserves respect for his greatness

Listen, I, I know Zach Hampel's a very controversial, actually, he's not controversial. Everyone just hates him. He's, he's the best to ever do it... When did we stop respecting greatness?... He's literally the best to ever do it. What he does, he is the best of all time at.

Auston Matthews has become 'too Canadian' and that's why the US lost the Four Nations tournament

My takeaway from this game is that Austin Matthews has become too Canadian. And that's why we lost the game. Because he's a Maple Leaf and Maple Leafs never win anything. And we saw that... in overtime just getting robbed.

The Milwaukee Bucks' championship window is likely already closed

The Giannis thing is is terrific... But I I think the reality is the NBA stories, the way they go, like their, their window's probably already closed.

NIL would have completely neutralized the crab legs controversy by allowing collectives to pay for them legally

I just want to educate everyone about the new addition of NIL and the things that it allows our young athletes to do... before NIL if you did anything illegal you would get suspended... when NIL started a lot of opportunities and doors that were already open were reopened with the birth of a collective... that crab leg thing would've never been like, 'oh my gosh.' I would've had so many crab legs.

Sean McDermott and Joe Brady committed coaching malpractice by running the tush push repeatedly.

What was really bullshit is the fact that Sean McDermott and Joe Brady decided to keep running the same play that the Chiefs were clearly ready for all game. And that was the tush push that they didn't even do correctly. They don't even push. They just rammed Josh Allen in the line. That was coaching malpractice in my eyes.

Alabama is now closer to a normal SEC team than they have ever been

Alabama... are way closer to a normal SEC team than they've ever been. And nothing is happening to make me think that's gonna change. Milroe is not good enough... they've been normal forever at receiver. They are normal.

Aaron Rodgers to the Steelers is a fascinating possibility

I'm fascinated by the possibility of him going to Pittsburgh. Remember that video of him and Mike Tomlin kinda making googly eyes at each other... I feel like that tracks with what the Steelers are currently doing at quarterback, which is, we don't know how to develop one. Let's just go find a veteran and plug him in.

Scott Hanson and NFL Red Zone are on the Hot Seat for airing commercials on a 'commercial-free' broadcast

My Hot Seat is Scott Hanson and NFL Red Zone... Their entire tagline for years since the beginning of Red Zone... Get ready for seven hours of commercial-free football. And on Sunday they ran commercials. They were like 30 seconds of commercial... you just completely rug pulled them.

Doug Gottlieb is doing a bad job coaching Green Bay and should spend less time on social media

Jesus, Doug, a seven game losing streak in the last place in the Horizon League. Less time on social media, more time in the gym... I think he's, has he won a game in December... He's doing things like his way... sat [his best player] for the entire game even though they can't win a game right now.

The 49ers aren't actually good; the Bears are just that bad

I don't think the 49ers are good. I just think the Bears are that bad... [Niners 38, Bears 13] That game sucked. The Bears are a joke. They're so bad... just same garbage team, same garbage start.

Travis Hunter should be a -5000 favorite to win the Heisman

I mean it should be like Travis Hunter minus like 5,000. If everything what PFT said is correct... it's something we've never seen before.

I will fight anyone who says Indiana shouldn't be in the playoff

I will fucking fight. If you find someone online who's saying Indiana should not be in the college football playoff—tag me snitch. Tag 'em. I just—I wanna fight 'em.

I am betting against LSU because they are using a fake Mike the Tiger on the sidelines

It appears that they are now bringing a tiger back onto their sidelines... it seems like it might be a fake mike, the tiger that they're putting on the sidelines, because people took pictures... and they compared the stripes and they think that it's a duplicate Mike. It's a fake Mike the tiger... in which case I am going to be betting against LSU.

Duke basketball is back

Duke's back... They beat Arizona State by 50 in a scrimmage... They might be back. God damnit they might be back.

The upcoming Giants vs. Panthers game in Germany is 'revenge' for World War II.

On Sunday, November 10th, there is a game being played in Munich, Germany. Between the Giants and the Panthers. We're finally even for World War II. We got 'em back.

Betting against Patrick Mahomes as an underdog is a move for morons.

I am the idiot who bet against Patrick Mahomes is an underdog now. No, actually I was gonna make an excuse for myself... but there is no excuse. I'm just a moron and I should, I should just stop gambling... If you try to outsmart Patrick Mahomes as an underdog, you're just a moron.

The Phillies are dead and they are a soft baseball team

The Phillies are dead... The Phillies are a soft baseball team. The Mets are a hard baseball team. They're a tough baseball team. They come back from things. And the Phillies just don't, they just die.

Aaron Judge is not a true Yankee because true Yankees get it done in October

I don't think he's a true Yankee, Big Cat... because true Yankees, they get it done in October. Look at the calendar. What does it say? It's October. [His average is .208]... It's Mr. June.

The best way to fix a locker room with no leadership is to add a malcontent wide receiver

I think the best way to fix [the Jets'] problem is by getting a malcontent wide receiver [Davante Adams] into a locker room with absolutely no leadership.

Travis Hunter is the best college football player I've ever seen

He is the best football player in the country... Travis Hunter. Travis Hunter deserves the respect. He might be the best college football player I've ever seen.

Justin Tucker is officially washed

We also had a passing of the torch in this game. We've talked about it, but Justin Tucker missing a 46 yarder and Brandon Aubrey making a 65 yarder. I think it's official washed.

Nick Sirianni should have been arrested for not kicking the field goal in the first half

The Eagles could have won if they had kicked that field goal in the first quarter. Which, and it's not, it's not hindsight to say it. I tweeted out at the time that Nick Sirianni should be arrested... I think that just the take that Nick Sirianni should be arrested is applicable to all sorts of different things that he does.

Justin Tucker is officially washed compared to his peak

Is Justin Tucker washed? Yes. He is washed compared to peak Justin Tucker. 100%. He's no longer Justin Tucker. He's no longer, 'Hey, we have a 50-yard field goal, we're gonna make it because we have Justin Tucker.'

The Giants-Commanders Week 2 loser is officially the worst team in the division

This is a true 'ass' bowl where the team who loses this game, if, especially if they lose it significantly, they're truly ass... A loss for [the Commanders] is different than a loss to the Giants. A loss for you, you still have Jayden Daniels... a loss for the Giants, you're like, we thought we'd be bad, but we're worse.

Deshaun Watson is a disgusting human being who also happens to stink at quarterback

Either he is the victim of the biggest, most coordinated, most ruthless smear campaign against an individual maybe in the history of sports, or he's a disgusting human being who should be in jail. Either way he stinks at quarterback.

Sam Darnold will have a 'seven-year bump' and be better than expected

I am throwing my vote behind Sam Darnold for a guy who's gonna be better than everyone expected this year. Sam Darnold is not as bad as everyone thinks. He's better. Sam Darnold might not be bad. Seven year bump.

Deshaun Watson is on par with Bryce Young and Daniel Jones and should be benched

He's not great. He's not good. He's not even average right now. I put him on par with Bryce Young or Daniel Jones. He can go stand in line with them, rip the bandaid off before it's too late. Deshaun Watson's done... folks, he can't play. I'm ticked.

Pandas are dumb as shit and terrible parents

Pandas. They're dumb as shit. They will hand you, you could google this, if you go to a panda in captivity and it has a baby... and you put out an apple, it will hand you its baby and take the apple. Swear to God, nobody talks about this. They're dumb as shit. They're mean, they're terrible parents. Bad moms.

The Miami Hurricanes are officially back

The U is back. Cam Ward is electric. He was electric last year. He he's awesome in the U. Yeah. It does feel like they're another team where a week one win on the road in the SEC, they now are in the driver's seat.

Florida State won't win another game until the fan who promised to eat dog shit actually does it

Coward, coward deleted his account. You gotta follow now that, listen, they're not gonna win any more games until this guy eats the dog shit out. That's facts. That's how it works.

No team in the Big 12 will finish with fewer than three losses

My hot take about the Big 12 is that nobody is coming outta that league with fewer than three losses. I think it's gonna be a one-bid league.

The Commanders fleeced the Eagles in the Jahan Dotson trade

We're fleecing the Eagles. Big time. You bunch of bald eagles over there got fleeced so hard. [Dotson] was fighting for the second spot... he was I think losing that competition to Martavis Bryant.