Takes

Trevor Lawrence is Teddy Bridgewater 2.0

He's like a six-month-old dog... His paws are big. He's got skinny shoulders. He's got skinny hips. Skinny knees. He's like Teddy Bridgewater 2.0.

Tyler Linderbaum is a first-round pick and the most compelling center to watch in football

Iowa is the first football team that I've ever watched where I can't take my eyes off the center. Tyler Linderbaum. I'm giving you that name right now... This dude, he's going to be first round pick. I would take him as high as it gets. I'm in love with watching... this dude just murders people. He destroys people.

Chip Kelly will leave the San Francisco 49ers for the Oregon head coaching job.

So Chip Kelly rumors are back, and I think he's going to go to Oregon. Then again, he did say he's not interested in it, and as we know, as Nick Saban proved to us... if a coach in the NFL says they're not going to college, that means they're not going to college.

College football is better when Nebraska is a good team

I rooting for you in Nebraska. I want you guys to be relevant again. College football is better when Nebraska's a good team. Yeah, when Nebraska's doing steroids in the 80s.

UNC is the most fun team to watch in college football

I think UNC might be the greatest team to watch in college football. There's so I feel like it's just gonna, you wanna talk about maximum chaos? I feel like that's gonna be UNC every single weekend.

Ohio State will beat Oregon in the Rose Bowl

The Rose Bowl's gonna be awesome. I think I'm gonna take Ohio State in that game. And it's mostly based on the uniforms that Oregon picked. I didn't really like 'em, I thought they should have done more classic.

Jim Harbaugh doesn't actually know his own roster when he wakes up every morning

I actually don't think that Jim Harbaugh knows what his roster is when he wakes up every morning. It's like Groundhog Day. Jim Harbaugh lives his life like a football Bill Murray.

Nick Saban smiles for less than two minutes after winning a national championship

Oh, fellas, you said two minutes. I'd take the under. I really would. That's a lock of the decade. Because even after we won the national championship, in the locker room, not kidding, we have the crystal ball in hand... He went into the locker room and said, 'hey, guys, great job... you know that's not how we play in the second half.'

Indiana winning at Oregon is the best college football win of the season

The Indiana win at Oregon I think is the single best win of the entire college football season. And I also think Oregon's getting dropped down too far in the polls after the fact, 'cause I think Indiana really is that good this year.

Oregon will be back on top of college football in four years when Chip Kelly returns

I'm going to call my shot. I'm going to say Oregon's going to win. If we can do like four years to call who's back, in four years Oregon's going to be back to being back. ... When they get Chip Kelly back, right?

The National Championship game should be played no later than January 10th

January 10th should be the latest they play the national championship. You can't have it. You can't have four NFL teams left and still not have a national title champion for college football. It just feels weird. It feels off. It's stupid.

Oregon looks like the best team ever

Oregon looks like the best team ever. Well they do. Dan Lanning... we gotta put a reminder out there that Dan Lanning, if anyone steps to Dan Lanning, take the other side.

Nick Saban doesn't have sex, he just 'soaks' and watches film

I don't think that Saban has sex. I think that Saban just soaks. You know what soaking is? Yeah, it's the Mormon thing. He just soaks it for a while. And then he's watching film, grading players at the same time.

Oregon is going to destroy Liberty in the Fiesta Bowl

17 points is not nearly enough points. They're so strong... They're way bigger than Liberty. So I'm hammering Oregon this weekend.

Oregon is currently the best team in the Pac-12 despite their loss to Washington

I do think Oregon, what they did in Utah on Saturday, like that doesn't happen to Utah. They bullied him. Oregon. It's weird because even though they lost to Washington, they look like they're the best team in that conference right now.

Travis Hunter will not be the only five-star recruit to join an HBCU

I liked it as well stated. And I don't think he's [Travis Hunter] going to be by himself. I'm just telling you that he's not going to be alone. I promise you. He is not going to be alone. You're going to hear about that real soon.

College Football Playoff prediction: Georgia, Michigan, Oregon, and Alabama

I'm gonna go Georgia, Michigan. I'm gonna go Oregon. I'm gonna say Oregon wins the Pac-12. First Pac-12 playoff participant since 2016. And then Alabama.

Oregon belongs in the SEC based on vibes alone

I honestly think that on vibes alone, Oregon should be in the sec. I feel like that's, that's where they belong as a, as a school. If I'm just like going strictly off five.

College football is fundamentally better when Nebraska is a good program

They're the quintessential college football is better when Texas is a good program. You know, it's like Texas. It's Notre Dame and Nebraska is like the third one of those programs. College football is better when Nebraska is good. That's a fact.

Taking away Tyler Warren effectively ends Penn State's passing threat

I actually think that a big impact on this game was when Tyler Warren got taken out. When you take Tyler Warren away from Penn State, then you take away all the threat of their, their physical passing because they're wide receivers. Can't catch a ball.

Colorado will lose to Oregon by a lot

I think Oregon's gonna win by a lot.

The Pac-12 is dying because people can't watch stars like Caleb Williams play on their network

The returning Heisman Caleb Williams, who would probably be the number one pick in the draft and no one in America could watch it 'cause it was Pac-12 network... that could not have been the better way to tip off the last Pac-12 season opener to be like, hey, this is why we're dying. Because we can't watch fucking Caleb Williams play football.

Oregon is back to sucking like they did before they were good

The University of Oregon is back to sucking like they did before they got good.

Oregon and Texas should have kept Mark Helfrich and Charlie Strong

I would have kept them both [Mark Helfrich and Charlie Strong], by the way. Absolutely. I really think you've got to give a guy four years.

Watching Beth Mowins call a low-scoring Big Ten game early on a Saturday morning was the perfect way to ease into a day of college football

The Big 10 has their new contract... That means, unfortunately, ESPN will not have the Big 10 and we will not have Beth Mowins putting us in a perfect spot on a Saturday morning, watching Purdue and Northwestern have a punt off. And I'm gonna miss that, because that game means a lot to me. It was a great way to ease you into Saturday because I don't like having a huge game right away.

Oregon's Kenyon Sadiq is a unique weapon with no equal in college football

Kenyon Sadiq, their tight end. There's nobody like Kenyon Sadiq in the whole country. He's, you know, 240 pounds, but runs like a, a really fast corner.

JMU will cover the +21.5 spread against Oregon

JMU's in the playoffs. We were playing against Oregon... I bet on JMU to cover at 21 and a half when the line came out. I think that there's a good chance that JMU can cover that.

My 2021 College Football Playoff field is Alabama, Ohio State, Clemson, and Oregon

I am doing the least chalky chalk I can, as far as my official predictions. I've got my playoff being Alabama, Ohio State, Clemson and Oregon.

The James Madison vs. Oregon playoff game is not a health and safety issue

Bud Elliot said that it was possibly a health and safety issue... he was like, I'm worried for the health and safety of JMU playing against Oregon... Stop saying it's a health and safety issue. Okay... fuck it, let's go win the game.

Washington will beat Oregon this weekend

I think that Washington was gonna beat Oregon this weekend though. Washington has not been good... I think they're gonna beat Oregon this weekend.

Bobby Petrino is a man of character who will clean up the North Carolina locker room as offensive coordinator

Bobby Petrino is going to be their new offense coordinator for next season. And I think that's a great hire. This is fun that Bobby Petrino, a man of character can get in, clean up that locker room and, and really change it from being a circus into a, a run of the mill workman like professional football organization.

The solution to Miami's football struggles is to hire a massive cheater and pay more money to players

Miami is a really easy problem to solve. It's like just let them cheat. Just hire the biggest possible cheater. Pay more. All the time. Find another guy that's got a Ponzi scheme going there and let him run the program again.

Oregon could be in serious playoff trouble if they lose to USC this weekend

What happens if Oregon loses this weekend? ... They could be in trouble because the one win that they have on their schedule that's really doing a lot of work is the Penn State win... the committee is still valuing that Penn State win as being a quality win because it's back when Penn State was good. ... but if you're looking for an argument against Oregon, if they lose this weekend, that's where you go.

It will be a long time before another walk-on quarterback starts for a National Champion

It will be, I'll say this confidently, there'll be a long time before we see a walk-on be the starting quarterback for a national champion again.

Oregon is better than every single team in the SEC this season

That team [Indiana] went into Autzen and was the better football team against the Oregon team that... look like they have seven weapons again and their quarterback looks like he's one of the best in the country... I have Oregon in my rankings ahead of all those SEC teams still because I think that much of Indiana.

If the College Football Playoff started today, my final four would be Georgia, Alabama, Oregon, and Penn State

If they started the college football playoff today, my final four would be Georgia and Bama, which obviously not new colors, but Oregon and Penn state new colors. And that's our color update.

Oregon head coach Dan Lanning is a 'war daddy' who is going to win a national championship

Dan Lanning is a war daddy... he's gonna win a national championship. I know that same [logic], you could say like, Hey, their toughest opponent they lost to Indiana... but I'm just, Dan Lanning is dude that, that guy is a war daddy. He's gonna win a national championship.

Nick Saban should have his man card revoked for getting a massage because of neck pain from watching film

Nick had to go out there and get a massage because he watched too much film and hurt his neck. So take his man card, Hank.

The Big 12 should offer Oregon and Washington a 'dream job' buyout clause to lure them away from the Pac-12

What I think the Big 12 should do is go to Oregon, Washington, be like... here's what we're going to do. You're going to come with us and we're going to put a clause in your deal that just says you want out fine. You're out. If the Big 10 is, you know... dream job buyout, or dream job clause. Do that and you get them, and then you'll get Utah and Colorado and you'll get whoever else you want from that league.

The winner of Oregon vs. Indiana will be the favorite to win the national championship

Whoever wins this game is gonna be favored in the national championship. I think it's, yeah, it's fair to point out that while Indiana looks super impressive... Oregon appears to be a much more formidable opponent.

Alabama will get into the CFP over Oregon even with the loss to LSU

I think Alabama still gets in. I think they would get in over Oregon... because dude, the committee loves SEC teams.

Iowa is a playoff contender if they run the table and beat Oregon and USC

I'll give you a one that I think is really interesting and they're not even ranked yet... Iowa. Iowa's gotta run the table. But they're if they can [beat Oregon and USC], they're in. Given the way Iowa's played... they get Oregon at home. If you can beat both those two teams, you can win out and you will make the playoff at 10-2.

Only Oregon, Ohio State, or Georgia can win the national title this year

I do strongly think that if your name's not Oregon, Ohio State or Georgia, you're not gonna win the whole thing.

The South only has Florida basketball and Bubba Watson once college football season ends

Basically the South has Florida basketball and Bubba Watson. [College football] is the South's real time to shine.

Winning three Heismans is a greater accomplishment than winning a national championship

Would you rather have a national championship or three Heismans? And a civil conflict. Easy. Three Heismans. I've won the Heisman every place I've gone, so that's a recruiting [pitch]. Like, hey, you want to win a Heisman? Come be with Coach Duggs because guess what? When he's up 30 points, he's still going to pad those stats.

Oregon State is working to become known as 'Punter U'

We've had some pretty good punters come through. The punter for the New England Patriots, Ryan Allen, him and I walked on there together... So we're kind of trying to earn that nickname or the moniker Punter U. Tennessee might have it right now, but we're working on it.

The Miami Hurricanes and Texas Longhorns are on the fraud watch list

I don't think it's fair for us to put Miami on the fraud list just yet after one week. Let's put them on a watch list... questionable Miami. I would say Texas is also questionably fraud.

Chip Kelly will be the head coach at Oregon within the next few years

Chip Kelly back to Oregon... yeah, because they're in some turmoil. Lost three games in a row. Silicon Valley to Nike Town... Chip Kelly to Oregon, going back to college. Listen, like Skip [Bayless] and Stephen A. [Smith], they need each other, right? That's when they were both at their most successful. So I think that's definitely going to happen.

Oregon will disappoint and could finish 8-4 or 9-3 due to a sneaky tough schedule

I think this is the team that people are just assuming is gonna be top 10 because of their recruiting profile... but they're kind of starting over. There's a lot of new guys here. I think and the schedule is sneaky tough. That last game at Washington. Oregon, you can fuck around and look up and they're like 9-3 or 8-4 and wouldn't be shocked.

Ohio State was the best team in the inaugural 12-team playoff

Ohio State has done it. $20 million roster. Incredible team... they kicked the shit out of everyone in the playoffs. They were the best team in this playoffs.