Hank

LeBron James will lose early in the playoffs and leave Cleveland

He's going to gas himself out, lose in the first or second round of the playoffs, and then leave town.

Roger Goodell skipping the Patriots season opener is a sign of disrespect that will lead to another title

Probably when [Roger] Goodell doesn't show up to game one. That's going to be a clear sign of disrespect that [the Patriots] are going to have to avenge by going to the Super Bowl and winning another championship.

The Patriots might go undefeated this season

Can the Patriots go undefeated? Okay. A lot of people are saying that. Many people are saying that.

LeBron James is going to break Cleveland's hearts by leaving again

It's really, though, I'm sorry, I just feel bad for the people of Cleveland because LeBron's just going to break their hearts again.

I could make the pros in five years as a knuckleball pitcher with seclusion and a personal chef

I said if you put me in a cabin in the middle of the woods with a personal chef and a knuckleball specialist, I could be in the pros within five years. I think with some training, seclusion, and just a lot more training, I could make it to the double A's and then, you know, who knows what happens from there.

Rajon Rondo is just one notch below Paul Pierce in Celtics history

When Rajon Rondo got traded to the Mavericks, I said he was a notch below Pierce, who was like a notch below Bill Russell.

Meditating is a top-four way to cool down in the summer

My last one is just meditating. Meditate... when I said meditating, I meant cool down like when you get hot in an argument. Like when you ever get in a really big argument. You need to take a deep breath.

DJ Khaled is on the hot seat because he got booed off stage at a music festival

My hot seat is DJ Khaled... he went to a music festival tried to perform actual music and just got booed off the stage because I mean he's all his songs are just other people singing and him in the background.

The whole world would benefit from Conor McGregor beating Floyd Mayweather

The world needs McGregor to win. That would be the best. The whole world would benefit from McGregor winning.

Apple purposefully sells iPhone chargers that break so you have to buy more

My number one [minor inconvenience] is buying iPhone chargers from, like, a gas station, and then when you plug them in, they just don't work... [Steve Jobs] basically has made a charger that cannot be duplicated... They have chargers that you can charge your iPhone once and it's just charged forever. They just won't sell them to us.

The Lombardi Trophy is the toughest trophy in sports to win

My number one is the Lombardi, actually. Toughest trophy in all sports to get.

The Cavaliers have no chance of winning Game 5 against the Warriors

Do you think the Cavs have any chance? [Hank]: Nope. [Big Cat]: Are you ready to dance on Cleveland's grave? [Hank]: Yes.

LeBron James has no killer instinct because he is a father of three

LeBron's a father of three, so this might have something to do with it, but he just has no killer instinct. He's too close to life. If you're the best player in the world, quotation marks, and you have the ball the way he had the ball at the end of the game, you take it to the hole and you try and get fouled. Or you at least ask for the ball.

The torch has officially been passed from LeBron James to Kevin Durant

Two, I had two, was the torch is passed. ... It's so much so that it's Kevin Durant's league that we have moved on from torch passing to Kevin Durant's legacy because he joined the Warriors.

NASA is lying about the sun probe to hide its real mission of searching for aliens

Stay woke, stay woke. They're saying it's the sun so they can be like, actually, the sun was too hot, it burnt, so no one's going to think about where that probe is. It's really in deep space going for the aliens.

If one nuclear bomb is launched, the whole world will blow up in a chain reaction

North Korea is developing nukes, and my theory is once one of those... So I've always thought once one nuclear bomb goes in the air, then... All the other countries and worlds are going to let them off, and then the whole world's going to blow up.

The Warriors will sweep the Cavaliers in the 2017 NBA Finals

I got Warriors in four.

The Celtics are in year five of a rebuild and are closing in on LeBron James' tail

We're in year five of a rebuild. We have the number one draft pick. We're in the Eastern Conference Finals. We're clearly coming up on LeBron [James]'s tail. As long as we can dominate LeBron in the beginning of his career and then dominate him on the way out, I can be content with that.

The Celtics have to draft Markelle Fultz with the number one pick

You gotta go with Fultz, you know, we, Celtics need another guard.

The Celtics are obviously going to lose the series to the Cavaliers

We're obviously going to lose the series. That's a fact. I mean, Isaiah [Thomas], he got worked by the Washington guards. He's going to get worked by Kyrie [Irving].

I am not confident about the Celtics playing the Cavaliers in the Eastern Conference Finals

I'm not really going to act like I'm super confident about playing the Cavs.

Instagram Stories will kill Snapchat by the end of the summer

My hot seat is Snapchat. Instagram stories, specifically because of Boomerang, are taking over the streets. I think by the end of the summer, Snapchat's going to be, like, default.

The Celtics could beat the Cavaliers if LeBron James gets hurt

That's kind of what Hank said last week about the Celtics, that they could beat the Cavs if LeBron James got hurt. [Hank]: True.

An NBA series doesn't actually start until the road team wins a game

Everyone's going to win on their home court... The series technically hasn't started unless the road team wins. [Big Cat]: That's when the series starts.

The Celtics are one LeBron James injury away from making the NBA Finals

[The Celtics] are like one big Cavaliers injury away from maybe making it to the show... By one big Cavaliers, [I] mean LeBron James. If LeBron James [gets hurt], then yeah, I think the Celtics have a pretty good shot.

If the Celtics win the next game handily, they will win the series against the Bulls

I think if [the Celtics] can win the next game handily, they can win the series.

The Celtics look lost without a 100% focused Isaiah Thomas

But for Isaiah Thomas, who's clearly the Celtics' number one option in the heart and soul of the entire team, for him to not be 100% focused and 100% there for obvious reasons... it just makes the team look lost. You can just tell they're not fully in sync.

It is okay to be a fair-weather fan

My who's back of the week is fairweather fans... I think it's okay to be a Fairweather fan. I don't like the people that come out of the woodwork being like, oh, you only cheers for the Bruins in the playoffs.

Betting over/unders in NHL playoffs is the biggest rush in gambling due to empty netters

My favorite part about the NHL playoffs is betting the over-unders. There's no bigger rush in gambling than the last minute empty netters.

Tony Romo will eventually make it to a Super Bowl as a broadcaster for CBS

Tony Romo hasn't thrown an interception in over a year. Tony Romo is going to be in a Super Bowl eventually. [On] CBS.

The Steph Curry 'Oxblood' shoes aren't actually that bad

I don't think they're that bad. That's all I was saying. I wouldn't wear them and buy them myself, but the way the internet freaks out about them, it's the worst thing in the world. There's been much worse NBA player shoes.

I am officially 100% on the Tim Tebow baseball bandwagon

I'm 100% on board the Tebow bandwagon. This is class A, first of all. I'm totally on board with Tebow.

San Diego State will win the 2019 National Championship

I like San Diego State. They got a decent class this year, great class in two years.

The Red Sox and Mariners will meet in the ALCS, the Cubs and Mets in the NLCS, and the Red Sox will beat the Mets in the World Series

I think the Red Sox and the Mariners are going to be in the ALCS... Cubs-Mets [in the NLCS]... Red Sox-Mets [World Series].

I'm taking Gonzaga -7 and North Carolina in the Final Four.

I've got Gonzaga winning. Minus seven? Yeah. And then I've got UNC.

The Celtics can beat the Cavaliers in a seven-game series with home-court advantage.

Do you think the Celtics can beat the Cavs in a seven-game series? Yes. With home advantage? Yes.

The Somali Pirates are officially a dynasty because they robbed their first ship in five years

My cool throne Somali Pirates. They robbed a ship for the first time in five years. Hell yes. So they are back.

Johnny Manziel is officially back and committed to a comeback after getting engaged

My who's back of the week is Johnny Football... Comeback season. He just got engaged to show that he's committed and he's making his comeback. So it seems like he's got everything going for him heading forward.

There is no point to checking out of a hotel; it's a vestige of the past

Explain to me what the reason of checking out of a hotel is... Today I walked down the lobby and there was a line all the way out the door of people waiting to check out. What is the point? They're nerds... Clocks are a vestige of the past. I tell my own time.

Adam Schefter is a beta who isn't 'man enough' to cheat on his wife

I don't think Schefter, I don't think he's, like, enough of a man to be a cuck... Schefter's a beta. Nobody except for his wife wants to have sex with him.

Kevin Durant is a front-running coward and a baby back bitch

Kevin Durant, pros. He's probably top three NBA player, probably best scorer, pure scorer in the NBA. Cons, skinny knees, slouches, and is a coward, front-running coward, and a baby back bitch.

ESPN on-air personalities are 'snowflakes' on the hot seat due to massive impending cuts

My hot seat is all the snowflake on-air personalities at ESPN. Big time cuts coming soon.

Draymond Green wouldn't be able to lead Paul Pierce's pre-KG Celtics teams to the playoffs

Draymond came over the top today and said, people tend to forget that [Pierce] was struggling to get to the playoffs. He was on the trade block every year, then all of a sudden Ray Allen and KG showed up... I would love to see Draymond Green on the teams that Pierce had and lead them to the playoffs.

Duke will lose in the second round of the NCAA tournament because they shoot too many threes

Duke... they're going to lose in the second round because they're going to shoot a million threes and miss. That's exactly what I said.

Buddy Hield lacks a killer instinct because his name is 'Buddy'

If you name your kid Buddy, you're saying you're going to be in the friend zone with everybody. That's what the name literally translates to. You're not a tough guy if your name's Buddy. You lack the killer instinct.

Aaron Hernandez's lawyer should argue the murder was just a game of 'Fuck, Marry, Kill' that went too far

If you look at the facts surrounding that murder, right? He was with his fiancee... he was also with a friend who was a female... and then there was a guy that he killed. So it could have just been a game of 'Fuck, Marry, Kill' gone way out of hand.

The Patriots' franchise success is suspiciously linked to the aftermath of 9/11

Patriots completely changed the course of their franchise after [9/11]. Look into it... the plot thickens. Bill Belichick has not won a Super Bowl without a quarterback [or a national tragedy].

Day parties are officially back

My who's back of the week is day parties. Huge weekend. 60 degrees out of nowhere in February. So basically, usually college kids will go through the winter depression, and then there was that one nice weekend that kicks off the rest of the spring semester.

Tony Romo will sign with the Los Angeles Rams

I think he's going to the Los Angeles Rams. Sleeper.

Bryce Harper doesn't have the balls to turn down the Yankees for the Red Sox

Me and Hank had a little conversation about Bryce Harper... and we're hearing rumors... that he might be going to the Red Sox. [Hank]: There's no chance. That'd be awesome. But he doesn't have the balls to do that to the Yankees. He can't turn down that money to come to the Red Sox.